𝐨𝐡 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐚 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐨 𝐝𝐨 || steve randles sister

𝐝𝐢𝐧𝐚𝐡

TW is put in effect for this chapter 

rape. 

rape is the meaning of vulnerability. the definition of your soul being stripped away at the hands of others. 

it doesn't matter your position of power when you're vulnerable. it doesn't matter how strong you are, because the moment someone takes advantage of you is the moment your world falls to its knees. 

rape is often times romanticized in the stories, seen as better than it really is. they don't know that there's noting good about your innocence no longer belonging to you. they thinks its "cool" to talk about. "cool" to bring up. it's more then that though, it's more than a simple word, because the complexity of the feeling is something many fail to explain. 

the thought of true violation is when someone oversteps and defy's your morals. when someone takes your beliefs and strips each one away the moment they lay eyes on you, the moment a hand is pressed to your skin. 

transgression, infringement, and breach are all terms for disobeying the laws of ones self.  the laws we built up with time to protect our body and our mind. they're the opposite of what we want to feel, rather then whats placed upon us by the force of others. 

so as i lay there; hands tied down to the bed post, hot breath forcing itself upon my neck, i thought of what i had before i came here. i thought of the strength i owned, and how powerless i now seemed to be. fighting back  remained useless as the girl beside me shrieked in fear. the music was to loud for our screams to be audible, to loud for our longing breath of help to be heard. 

i dug my nails into my clenched fists as a hand was placed on my thigh, making its way up my leg. shaking with a sting of uncomfortable reality, i kicked my legs, fighting to break free. it was useless, but i decided not to accept my fate. it was to early to give up, to early to let go.

my mumbled screams echoed through and beyond the duck tape , as archies lips found its way to the side of my neck. my voice trembled, as his hands forced my head to the side. 

the girl beside me was young, probably younger then me. maybe around 13. i started to wonder how she managed to get into a party like this, even pondered how long shes been here fighting for her life. we were both young, but it seemed up to me to tell her that it was going to be okay, even is i didn't have anyone to tell me. 

our eyes met as i tried to tell my story.

she seemed to understand. 

her head was shaking almost violently, as i realized something was up. she was mumbling random words that didnt make sense in the moment. words that didn't revolve around help. there was something wrong, other then the situation we were living. 

sucking on the tape above my lips, it moistened, tearing itself from my skin. the glue like taste filled my mouth, as i swallowed my pride, and yelled for help. screaming for ponyboy, or noraa, or jennie. screaming for anyone who would listen. 

it was flying by, but this moment has never felt so slow. 

"shut her up!" one of the guys yelled, as he took my dress in his hand, preparing to tear it open by the way his nails were gripping the material.