I Lied When I Said I Was Okay (frerard)

part 4- I'm not crazy, I'm just a little unwell

hiya guys! i'm sick... hellusinations.... fucking flying unicorns and shit >< anyways I'm stuck in bed the whole day so i used it to write a new part :3

Gerards p.o.v:

It’s been a week since what happened in the cemetery. I’m making sure to hide my feelings now, but it’s not that easy. Frank has been acting all strange lately. He would stare at me, then lush and turn away mumbling ‘shit’ or ‘sorry’. He’s get out of school fast, not waiting for me, always making up a different excuse.

I was worried about him. Also, it gave me a feeling that he might know about… you know… me being all over him.

I tried calling, but his mom answered and said he was sleeping. Poor Frankie, I know he doesn’t like sleeping, so something probably happened.

I need to find out what’s wrong with him. Tomorrow I’ll ask him at school.

Frank’s p.o.v:

Crap. I have school tomorrow. And that means… Gerard. It’s not that I don’t want to see him, I’m just… worried… what if he knows my dirty little secret? I did my best to hide it, but let’s face it… I’m not the greatest actor or liar. I get all red and start stuttering.

Ugh, fuck it… I’m so tired of everything… why can’t all the pain stop at once?! It’s just… so fucking hard…

maybe… just once… it couldn’t do THAT much harm can it?

I think I’ll give it a shot. I got out of my bed and walked to the kitchen, tears slowly escaping my aching eyes.

As I got there, I noticed a note on the fridge, probably from my mom.

‘I’m doing a night shift today honey,

wont be back until tomorrow morning.

Get something to eat; I left some salad in the fridge.

p.s. Gerard called; he said he needed to talk to you.

Call him back, he sounded pretty serious.

Xoxo mum <3’

I wasn’t in the mood to eat something, And definitely not in the mood to call Gerard.

I went back to my business. I grabbed a chair and pulled it to the counter. I stood on it and started snooping on the shelf.

Ah, here it is!

I grabbed it, climbing off the chair and putting it back in its place.

Here we go…

And what was I looking for, and now holding? Well, it was a sharp, clean silver knife.

You can easily guess what I intended to do with it…

I stood in front of the sink. I took off my gloves, revealing my perfectly clean good wrist.

Well… at least until today…

my hands were shaking as I lifted the knife to my wrist, slowly placing it on my skin.

I brushed it on my skin, slow and hard. The pain was sharp.

It made me forget everything and concentrate on the blood dripping from my hand.

“So it actually works then…” I said to myself, but that was enough. Only one cut. I wasn’t going to do more, it could hurt me and people can notice it.

As long as it’s just one cut, no one will notice and it wouldn’t hurt my health.

I washed the knife, and pulled back my skeleton gloves.