Never ending

Learning to live

It's been 2 months. I have called my mom. A lot. And yes, I'm staying with my brother Cameron, Nash, Matt, Tyler, and Hayes. It's been awesome here and I just love it in L.A. It's nice here. Ad late at night tyler, me and Matt sneak put and look go my sister. No sign of that truck yet but if it's not here, then explore the world we go.
I looked up her reports on every website she got showed on and I have took notes from it. I'm very close to getting my missing sister back. But Cameron cannot know. Cause if he finds out, then he'll get all protective on me. And I don't want that to happen. Cause I want my sister back just as much as he does. I only take off 2 days a week. One of those days was when Cameron had a welcoming party for me and let's just say, don't trust the drinks at parties cause I lost my v-card. But I'm very happy that it was Matt that took it but then again sad. That party was last week. He told me to forget that anything happened. But that's the problem. I don't wanna. Yeah, I might seem all tough stuff on the outside cause I'm not scared of a lot if things, but when Matt came, I knew that he would protect me even if I was scared of anything. But since that night, we haven't spoke a word to each other. I'm hurt. Cameron knows and I'm happy he wasn't mad. But I just want my Matt back. I'm crying on the inside cause I thought he actually liked me. Guess not.
I am currently in the kitchen by myself eating toast with Nutella. Everyone is asleep cause it's like 2:30 in the morning. Im stressed. I have to go out looking for my sister tomorrow and I have a good feeling about it too.
I was just staring out into space thinking about all this until I got interrupted.
"Hey, why you up so early?" Tyler asked. "Oh umm. Just thinking. Hey I'm just gonna go by myself tomorrow and I want you and Matt to stay here. Okay?" I said. "Kory, I can't let you do that. Me and Matt care about you to much to let you get hurt. Those people can hurt you. Bad. They took your sister from you and they can take you from me. Kory please" Tyler begged. "Ty, even tho I know you live me and all but I'm stressed about everything. Last week and everything. I'm hurt. Disappointed. I thought Matt actually had feelings for me but I guess he don't. I just need to go by myself tomorrow and I need to work this out by myself. I'll be fine. I promise." I said trying my best to calm her down. "Kory, what happened between you and Matt, I know will never change, but I know good and well that he wouldn't be stupid enough to let you go out and get hurt. He may not show it to you now, but I know that he likes you. You just don't want to believe it. But only if you text me while your out tomorrow and tell me what's going on, then okay." She explained. "I'm gonna be fine." I said to her. "I love you boo!" I nicknamed her that when we were 5. Don't judge. "Love you too bubbles." She responded. That was my nickname from her. I like it tho. I got up, cleaned up my mess and walked out of the kitchen. When I walked out, I saw the least expected.
Matthew.
"Do you really think that?" He said with his hair everywhere and tears in his eyes. "Matt just sit. "Kory. I don't want you hurt. Yeah I know that last week was kind of awkward for us, doesn't mean that I don't care about you anymore. We are graduating this year and I will not forget about this year. Not one moment. Kory, please don't ever think that I don't care about you anymore. Please. I'm literally crying cause I made you feel this way. It kills me to know this" he said crying holding my shoulders. Letting it all go. "Matt, I lost my virginity to you. I was supposed to lose that to the person that I knew that would be by my side for the rest of my life. But then you told me to forget about it. You should've felt the way I felt. Stayed in my room for 3 days crying and not talking. Matt, I thought that I would be okay. I just need to find my sister and un-stress myself. Just let me try. Please Matt." I begged. I was already crying. He looked at me with deep emotions in his eyes. I wiped his tears from his eyes. "Don't worry. I will one back safe and I come straight to you." I said. He pulled me in a right hug and I hugged back after I felt my arms again. "Don't let go yet. Please." Matt begged. "Why would I?" I said. "I don't want you hurt. Just stay safe and out of sight by bad people for my sake." Math said finally releasing himself from me. "I will." I kissed his cheek and took him by the hand and led him to my room. "Just stay with me tonight so I know that I'm safe as long as I'm with you." I said pulling him in my bed. "I will. It's just dangerous. The place your going, has had so many people hurt there and I don't want to go on with the list but, I want to protect you." He said wrapping his arm around me. "I will always remember." I kissed his nose and cuddled up into his chest. I calmed myself with the beat of his heart and fell asleep.