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Songs of the chapter:

Out Of The Woods, Taylor Swift.

Crazy, Aerosmith.

I didn't know I was telling this to someone but I did and somehow I feel better now. I have called her daily and Niall too to know how they both are but I've been thinking about myself more than in her.
"You're not selfish, you're just bearing with a lot of things and you're so strong so you think you can deal with everything but you can't with this alone and you have me here to help you, okay?"
"Thanks," I smile, "you should go with Gem and I'll go to sleep because I'm really tired,"
"If you need us just knock our door,"
"I will, dad," I laugh and walk to my room.
It's really cute and comfy, Snuggles is sleeping again in the sand and for the way he reacted I'm not capable of touching him again so I prefer to leave him there. I change my phone to my British line again and open Twitter till I fall asleep.
All I can see is "Harry and Taylor". Some people send me tweets hoping I am okay and others are happy that we are over. I Google them and the first thing that pops up is "Is Harry back to Taylor after breaking up with her 1 year girlfriend Linda?"
I lock my phone and curl into bed, I can't believe he walked into another woman after two weeks and possibly that's why he didn't call me back today, is he with her? Somehow I feel relief it isn't Paige but I feel pain knowing he forgot about me so easily.
I want to cry but then I realize I'm doing it again, I could be calling Kaylee instead of crying right now so I wipe my stupid tears and unlock my phone again.

Harry's POV.

Why did she call me and then just leave me talking alone? I don't even know why I didn't call her back, I just wanted to hear her voice and for being a coward I didn't do it.
I'm in London and I really want to see her... I know letting her go was the best, I know I hurt her doing her this but I just want the best for her.
My phone buzzes and I remember I haven't turned off Linda's Twitter notifications.
"@KayMartin09 not funny"
So I open the tweet and see what Kaylee tweeted.
"@Williams_Linda Stockholm syndrome was written for you loveeeeee"
And I laugh just thinking about the lyrics, I see how the conversation isn't from that tweet but from at least ten tweets more so I slide to the first one.
"@kaymartin09: My best friend is the hottest chick ever" and she posts a picture, they're FaceTiming and Linda is making a funny face while Kaylee frowns.
"@Williams_Linda: delete it @kaymartin09!"
"@kaymartin09: @Williams_Linda don't you want everyone who loves you to see the real you?"
"@Williams_Linda: don't make me hold you hostage for making me this... @kaymartin09"
And there's where everything started and I realize it has nothing to do with me. Kaylee is doing so much better, Niall and I went to visit her and she can sit by herself and move her neck as before so she will recover sooner than expected and she's coming back to London, it's better if she comes back to her real home so she feels better than remembering what happened there and turns into the old Kaylee again, she asked me not to tell Linda about this because she wants to surprise her even though she knows we don't talk anymore.
I just hope she accompanies us tomorrow to the cemetery and the mass, I really need her know that one of the most important people for me passed away.

Linda's POV.

"You didn't have to do it,"
"I'm so proud of myself and I will cry if you don't eat my pancakes," I warn them both.
"At least come and eat with us," Jacob speaks.
"I already ate will preparing them, I'll go and get ready for college because I'll be so late,"
I start walking to the room when Gemma calls my name.
"Yeah?" I turn around.
"My grandmother's burial is at 4:00 pm can you make it?"
I actually have just two classes today... My duty is going to support but Harry will be there and I'm just so mad, I don't want to see him in the eyes after knowing he was yesterday with Taylor but wait... if he's touring and he was with Swift it means he isn't here today.
"I'll go," I smile.
"I swear," I nod and she laughs.
I go and change my clothes now that I already took the shower. I put on leggings, a skinny top and the warmest jacket I found at home because weather is crazy and is freezing these days. I wear riding boots and make a low bun with my hair, I finally feel pretty today after being a disaster for fifteen days.
Talking to Kaylee made me so good, knowing she's progressing and she's so happy makes me happy... not at all but I feel much better than before and I don't feel an awful person any more.
I leave the house after saying goodbye and feel like a girl going to school when Jacob gives me my lunch.
I drive my car to college and enter to my favorite class of all -creative writing-, then it comes the boring one -history- and finally lunch, I don't feel like eating here so I decide to go home but when about to get in my car someone touches my back.
"Hey," I smile when I see this girl from my creative writing class in front of me.
"Hi, I was wondering if you could help me getting closer to my flat? I lost my car keys," she sighs stressed.
"Sure! Where's your flat?"
"A block before yours," she answers.
I frown, "how do you know where I live?"
"Well you are Harry Styles' girlfriend and I've seen picture of you guys there and I recognize that street," she smiles naively.
"Oh right, come in..." I say and she nods.
I start the car and we don't say a word to each other till the first traffic light.
"So it's true?" The girl speaks.
"You broke up,"
I just look at her like wondering why she asks me so.
"By the way you reacted when I mentioned him it looks like you don't like him that much now,"
"Please don't say that to anyone or it will appear in some magazine or something and I'll put him into troubles,"
"I swear I won't," she raises her hand, "but you still care about him or you wouldn't ask me this..."
I am not talking about this with a girl I barely know, I don't even know her name!
"Hey, I've dated famous people too so you can talk to me about him,"
"Have you?" I open my eyes surprised.
"Do you know Theo James, the one from Divergent?"
"You don't say you dated that sunshine?" I look at her astonished.
"No, I didn't," she laughs, "I dated the guy from his favorite band,"
"What band is it?" I shake my head smirking.
"The Other Street," she answers.
"Does it ever exist?" I enquire incredulously.
"It doesn't," she laughs, "but just feel confident talking to me about him... like if weren't a fuckboy,"
"What the heck is a fuckboy?" I ask laughing.
"You know, those guys who mess up with girls feelings but are still blooding hot,"
I sigh and open my mouth still unsure, "Harry broke up with me, he said we needed time because it wasn't working that good... I saw this magazine where it said he was seeing Taylor Swift again and I feel like he didn't need time for himself but away from me,"
"Holy shit... you're cheated with Swift while I was with an older rich woman,"
I laugh, I know she is joking to make me feel better so I don't feel bad at all with her comment and I find it really hilarious.
When we get to Miranda's flat we continue laughing in the car, I lean my back on the car door and she does the same, I open my "lunch" and we both eat it.
I have an amazing time and it feels odd but good to have fun with another friend, I see how social I can be and stop thinking about my past and how everyone at school hated me for actually doing nothing, for not attending and paying people to do my homework... nothing compared to nerdy Linda today.
"and yeah, my mom told me to ask my old neighbor for sugar and I found Ben there! It was so gross... I wanted to vomit just thinking that the dick that was once in me went into my neighbor and I threw up right in her door,"
I laugh so hard at her story, we've talked about boys and college and movies all at once...
My phone rings, I check it and Jacob sent a message:
"Holy shit," I whisper.
"What's wrong?"
"I needed to be somewhere else twenty minutes ago,"
"Go now! You're so late, see you tomorrow Linda!" She hugs me and leaves the car.
I start the car and drive the faster I can to the church, God helped me making all the traffic lights stay green so I could get in time but when I parked everyone was leaving the chapel.
"Ugh," I rest my head on the wheel.
I hear a knock on my window and I see Des right beside me, I open the door and get off the car.
"Linda, so delightful having you here," he hugs me tight.
"I'm sorry for your loss Mr. Styles,"
"Thank you... Linda, be sorry for not calling me Des,"
"Sorry Des,"
He takes my arm and guides me to the bunch of people talking, I don't see Jacob or Gemma but Des introduces me to his relatives as Harry's good friend. This isn't like last time, he already told everyone we are not together anymore and that's even sadder.
When I'm left with an old woman, my eye spots Harry looking at me while he is with a blond woman, who isn't Taylor, beside her is a little kid and a man who looks so much to him but fatter.
I turn my attention back in the story of the woman who's talking to me but I feel him looking at me and just when I tilt my head a little bit I see him walking to me.
Holy Molly.
I breath heavily and try to act the most normal I can.
"hey Leslie," he hugs the woman and she hugs him back.
"You've grown so much my teddy bear," she says and I laugh but then cover my mouth.
"Not here Leslie," he whispers and she laughs.
"Funny as always, well... I'll leave you too talk because it's obvious you didn't come here for me,"
"Darling I will be loving you till we are seventy," Harry touches her shoulder.
"Don't come and quote me your songs because I've heard them all!" She scolds him and walks away.
"Isn't that an Ed Sheeran's song?" I ask Harry while laughing.
"Leslie has always thought Ed is part of us," he laughs along with me.
"I love having you here, I really appreciate your presence... I know we are not okay right now but you coming to support me here it's just-,"
"I came because Gemma asked me, not for you," I spat.
He doesn't say a word and I don't either, I won't stay here looking at him and feeling uncomfortable so I turn on my heels and see Jacob with Gemma so I walk to them.
We go to the cemetery, in my car I carry three people I don't even know and Leslie.
"Don't get me wrong but Harry's a good kid,"
I don't say anything because I don't really know what to say,
"Whatever he told you to make you angry wasn't on purpose," she continues.
I just nod and she stays silent the rest of the way to the cemetery.
I'm not a fan of these places and they scare me a lot so I stay behind everyone, when all the people start walking away I look for Gemma but find Harry crying instead beside a tree.
My feet walk me to him, my hand makes me touch his shoulder and when he turns around my heart pushes me to hug him tight.
"As I said before she's better up there beside her husband not suffering at all, she's taking care of you, Gemma and your father all the time..." I look at him.
He smiles, I wipe his tear falling from his cheek and his lips drive to mines but I push him away before he can kiss me.
"Don't. I just wanted to make you feel better... you dumped me, remember? And you're looking for Taylor so I'm not a -,"
"Sorry," he says nerveless, "that shit of Taylor and I is just a lie I haven't even talked to her since we broke up two years ago,"
"Still you dumped me," I shrug, "you tried to kiss me to mock me then saying that I can't resist you and I'll be always begging you to be with me when that's not true at all,"

"You're like Taylor," Harry rolls his eyes.
"For real? Her hair is way shorter than mine though but I really think our skin and lips are similar..."
"You both are insane when I'm no longer with you," he walks away.
I park my car, I just don't want to walk to the elevator and get to my flat all alone so I decide to call Miranda to come over, I know it's late but I don't want to be here all by myself because I didn't even bring Snuggles, I forgot to pick him up before getting here.
I didn't even see Gemma or Jacob after I told them I had to study tomorrow and I couldn't go to the Styles reunion with them.
"Thanks for coming," I sigh and open my door.
"I love your flat, wow..." She walks to the living room and takes a photograph from the shelf.
"You two are perfect together still," she looks at it. "You should talk to him and make up everything because you're so good together..."
"I saw him today. I went to his granny's burial because I'm friends with his sister and he was crying and I can't see him crying because it's heartbreaking so I hugged him and he tried to kiss me but I pushed him away and he got so mad. He even told me I was insane!" I sit down.
"Did he?" She sits beside me. "If you still love him why didn't you let him kiss you so you can be together again?"
"He dumped me when I didn't do anything wrong Miranda, he messed up everything and I forgave him but he couldn't forget my only one mistake and asked me for time... now he says that those Haylor rumors are fake!" I exclaim pissed.
"They are, I Googled it and there are no proves it happened. Taylor is in New York while he was in Massachusetts. That's not true,"
"I'm so confused," I cry. "I love him but I hate him... you don't even understand how much it hurts to be away from him after speaking daily for a year with him. He is the only thing I have here and I miss him so much. I'm so reckless and I don't even follow my feelings but just my mind but I needed to explode sorry..." I sob.
And my door rings.
"I'll attend it, just calm down and breath..." She taps my leg and walks to the door, I rest my head on my knees and inhale to stop crying but I just end up crying more, all the tears I haven't let fall two weeks ago.
"Mamma Mia," Miranda mumbles.
I raise my head and walk to the door, Harry is standing right in front of her and she doesn't move at all.
"Linda we need to talk," Harry enters to the house like if he had the permission.
I give a step back and wipe my tears.

"I'll go to your room," Miranda speaks.
"I'm sorry for calling you insane, I'm sorry for making you cry this much, I really didn't mean it... this is just not the best day for me,"

"It's okay," I shake my head up and down.

"Linda I love you and you know I wouldn't hurt you even if I want to," he gets closer, places his hand on my cheeks and wipes my tears.

"Who are we lying to, Harry? We are hurting each other. We can be friends but we need time for ourselves, at least while you are on tour just don't call me or message me and I won't do the same,"

"Maybe you're right,"

And he answered just what I didn't want him to answer, he didn't fight for this and it means he doesn't really want to be with me.

It's over Linda, get over it.

"So... good luck in your tour," I say.

"And good luck at Uni..."

He gets closer to me, I move closer to kiss his cheek or hug him but he just taps my shoulder and walks to the door, mouthing a "bye Linda"

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