For your eyes only - l.s

Chapter Twenty-Three

Wow I've actually updated - how do we like this? Sorry for taking so long... I hope this chapter is making up for it! My family issues that caused me to stop writing haven't solved out but I've decided that I love this story too much to abandon it any longer. Now enjoy!

Harry hopes that this is not too much of a bold move but on the other hand, what else is he supposed to do? It's not like he's trying to make Louis stay by all means – okay, maybe a little bit, but mostly he is not keen on getting killed by ice cream poisoning.

Louis raises an eyebrow at him, and Harry is nearly certain he'll say no and leave, but the other man actually surprises him. A smirk makes it to Louis' lips, and he extends his hand.

"I wasn't planning to leave without having had ice cream," he replies, snatching a cornet from Harry's hands.

Harry shakes his head and grins softly, watching Louis turn around and take a few steps as if he wants to make sure that his ice cream is in safe distance. It's not like Harry would try to steal it – he's got more than enough himself.

He follows Louis into the direction of a less crowded place near a huge tree in the middle of the fair. They walk next to each other in comfortable silence for a while, both of them getting lost in their own thoughts. This day has been weird – in a good way so far. But still, Harry can't find himself fully enjoying it. Although he was kind of confident about how to warm Louis up a little, he has recently been doubting himself and his whole plan. Somehow it feels wrong to invade his life so much.

"I'll treat this as a deposit," Louis suddenly says out of the blue, pointing at his ice cream.

"What?" Harry dumbly replies after a moment. Has Louis been talking and he didn't hear it?

"A deposit," Louis repeats. "For the candy floss you promised that I've never received."

"I did what?"

"Don't tell me you forgot about it already," Louis groans. "You know, the way you tricked me into joining the both of you yesterday...?!"

"Oh... Sorry about that...," Harry sighs, scratching the back of his neck while smiling softly. He knows that Louis meant it in a joking way when he said 'tricked' but somehow it just testifies his view on the situation. He is forcing himself on Louis, something he never wanted.

"Harry," Louis suddenly says from behind, making Harry turn around and notice that Louis hasn't been walking next to him anymore for a few steps.

"Yeah?"

"What's wrong? You've been kinda off the whole day..."

"Oh umm... I'm fine, really," Harry replies, trying a smile.

"Oh please," Louis rolls his eyes. "Don't even try to fool me, Styles. You know you can't."

This makes Harry actually smile. "I'm just a bit tired, that's all."

"Nice try but nope," Louis deadpans, eyeing Harry cautiously.

Harry sighs deeply, drawing his gaze away from Louis and letting it wander across the place. What is he supposed to say?

"Hey...," Louis says softly, taking a few steps towards him. "You can trust me, you know?"

Of course Harry knows. And he does. He would trust him with his life if it came to it. When looking into these eyes he just can't lie so Harry lets his shoulders slump.

"Am I too much? Am I overwhelming you? Do you... Do you want me to go away... to leave you alone? I'd get it. I mean, I'm totally forcing myself on you, turning up out of nothing and invading your life like you've got nothing better to do than wasting your time with me... I-"

"Harry... Harry! Hold up a second, stop," Louis says firmly, gently placing one hand on Harry's shoulder. The other man swallows thickly. "What makes you think any of this?"

"I- I don't know... I mean my whole world collapsed when I lost you and seeing you again now... I don't know, I kinda had the urge to at least try and fix what I did wrong... Part of me thought that this was possible... But I don't know how I got the idea that you could actually want that... I mean you probably had a damn good reason to remove me from your life and I guess you were right to do so... And here I am, completely ignoring your decision and...-"

"Don't you think that there might be the slightest chance I could have changed my mind?"

"I don't know... Have you?"

Louis looks at him firmly, sighing deeply. He shrugs. "Might have...?"

These words make Harry forget to breath for a moment. "About which part exactly have you changed your mind?"

"You are right, I had a damn good reason for doing what I did. I didn't see an other option back then... To be honest I still don't know what else I should've done. But I've also regretted it. I mean I lost my best friend. Life wasn't the same without you. I wish we would've kept what we had – would've sticked with this. I've thought about it quite a lot and I've come to the conclusion that everything happens for a reason. That maybe this is a second chance. My chance to get my best friend back. To start over again and... and stay on the right path this time – without making the same mistake again," he nearly whispers the last part. "Does this sound stupid?"

"N-no... not at all," Harry replies quietly, his voice cracking a little.

"So... do you think we could try this? Become friends again... only friends?"

"Yeah... of course. If that is what you want...?" Harry means it. He is grateful for everything Louis is willing to give. And if he offers him friendship, or at least the beginning of it, he is definitely not going to reject this. All he could ever wish for is Louis being part of his life again – whatever part Louis would like to be. For ten years he did not believe that he would get this chance of fixing their friendship – fixing his mistake. And now this aim is so suddenly within reach, it still feels surreal. He isn't sure if it is really happening.

Louis studies Harry's features for a moment before taking a deep breath. "Yeah, that's what I want."

Relief washes over Harry as he hears the words from Louis. This is all he could ever be allowed to ask for. Deep down he knows that he would have liked to hear something else from him, but he is not in the position to complain. One step at a time. "Okay..."

Louis' gently squeezes Harry's shoulder and gives him a shy smile. "Okay..."

"Can I give you a hug?"

"I'd say yes but I'm not keen on finding ice cream somewhere on my clothes or in my hair later," he states, pointing at the third cornet that Harry is still holding. The ice cream has long started melting.

"Then better not..." Harry chuckles awkwardly. "Do you want it?" he asks, holding up the cornet.

"How is that even a question?" Louis says, snatching it from his hand. They both laugh and Harry finds himself feeling much less tense than before their conversation.

"Have I made up for the missing candy floss now?" Harry asks with a grin.

"Hmm...," Louis seems to think about it. "Not yet."

"I know how to fix this. Where's this thingy where you knock over plastic ducks with baseballs? I'm going to win you a goldfish."

"And what am I supposed to do with a goldfish?" Louis asks, both amused and slightly worried about Harry's mental state.

"What you usually do with a goldfish... You know, put it in a fishbowl, place it on your nightstand and tell it your darkest secrets before you go to sleep... Normal goldfish stuff."

"You're crazy."

"I know. Are we going?"

"Sure... But I want the prettiest goldfish."

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