Kissing Is the Easy Part

Chapter 20 The kiss (1)

"Okay." She sniffled. "As the birthday girl, am I allowed to make a wish?"

"By all means."

Then she leaned in and kissed me.

I was so startled I didn't know how to react, and I may have jerked back after a second. I had seriously never considered Leslie in a romantic way, and she was always so innocent and harmless I thought she came off more like a pet rabbit.

"Leslie..."

Her eyes welled up instantly. "I'm sorry," she whispered. Her face crumpled like a withering flower as she got up to walk away.

I grabbed her arm out of reflex. "Wait. I was...you took me by surprise, that's all."

She looked at me briefly and stared down. The hint was too obvious and I really had no time to deliberate. I lifted her chin and kissed her again, half confused and half thinking that was what I was supposed to do.

***

That was how it started with Leslie, a typical "it just happened" beginning. At first I felt like I was pushed into this relationship before I was ready. People saw us kissing at the party and pretty soon it was all over school, and I didn't know how to explain without hurting her.

Not surprisingly, Janet offered me her theory of conspiracy about how Leslie deliberately conned me into this relationship with the right place and time carefully orchestrated.

"Have I not warned you that this is coming?" she said, a bold I-told-you-so etched on her face. "How could you not know she likes you?"

"I generally don't assume people like me unless they make it clear. I don't want to be cocky about it."

"Not everyone is as blunt as Flora," Janet remarked. "Some are just more calculating."

"I don't think she's calculating."

"God you are naïve." Janet rolled her eyes. "So you kissed her because she cried? Was that like a pity kiss?"

"I panicked, okay?"

"Flora really should cry more in front of you," she said dryly.

Why was she mentioning Flora again? I wished she would stop doing that.

"It's not entirely because of her tears," I said. "I felt something."

"A hard-on?"

"No." I glanced at her with annoyance. "I felt hope. Like it's something real."

Janet scoffed.

"I just thought maybe it could work, and I want to try." Most of my past girlfriends started out as instant attraction and never seemed to get me anywhere. Just look at how the fireworks with Flora sizzled and exploded in my face.

Janet shook her head, looking profound. "I really don't understand you kids these days. That's not a good way to start a relationship, and Leslie is so not your type."

"You don't know my type," I said defensively.

"But I do," she said with irritating confidence.

"Leslie and I are good friends already, and there are qualities that I like about her."

Janet shrugged. "Are you interested in my opinion?"

"Not in the least."

She offered anyway. "I think you deliberately pick someone who's the entire opposite of Flora. What you really should be doing is sort things out with Flora, instead of whatever rebound thing you're doing."

"Thank you, Freud. That's enough therapy for today."

I felt contented being with Leslie, and a rare feeling of being much appreciated. Ever since we got together, she had been very attentive to me and made it clear how important I was to her, and she was very much interested in learning about me. If my relationship with Flora had been mostly physical, then with Leslie it was definitely more verbal. She was great at expressing herself and understanding my point.

I tried to make Janet see this but she didn't believe me.

"Sean, just because Flora is gorgeous and you have great chemistry does not mean it's not real," she said. "Yes, she can be a little insensitive sometimes, and she's not as eloquent as Leslie is, but she cares about you a lot in her own way. I think you're belittling your relationship with her by defining it as mere physical attraction, when you know it was so much more than that."

I rubbed my palm over my eyes wearily. Janet didn't know that by deeming my last relationship meaningless was the only way it could make me hurt less. It was human survival instinct.

"Can we stop talking about Flora? This is not about her."

"I just think it's such a shame that you guys broke up over one stupid fight about nothing. I can tell there are unresolved feelings. I don't want to interfere, but Flora is really serious—" She stopped after seeing the expression on my face. She held up her hands. "Okay. Backing off."

"Can you just tell me you're happy for me?"

"I am happy for you," Janet said unconvincingly. "I just wish your girlfriend was a little friendlier."

"She is friendly. Give her a chance."

"Whenever you bring her along, she always stays a step back and basically says nothing."

"Come on, that's because she finds our friends intimidating."

"Intimidating?" Janet raised her eyebrows. "Do we need to give her a balloon to convince her we're nice?"

"See? That kind of attitude is exactly what scares her."

"Fine. Invite her to come with us to the beach this weekend, okay? I'll be on my best behavior."

***

Dedicated with love to @MicA__M  for entering my KITEP one shot contest x