For every story tagged #WattPride this month, Wattpad will donate $1 to the ILGA
Pen Your Pride

part 1- I'm (not) Okay

37K 734 581

alrightie, this is a new frerard story :3 i guess it turned out pretty bad, but i'll appreciate it if you read it.

Emptiness. That was what he felt, yes. He was empty inside. Hate. Misery. Pain. That was all he felt, all the time.

“Are you okay there buddy?” his little loved brother Mikey asked.

 “I’m fine. Go to your room now.” Gerard answered, but Mikey kept standing beside him. “NOW!” Gerard demanded. Mikey sighed and looked at his brother concerned. “Gee, just please don’t do anything you might regret… I love and I need you, the REAL you.” After Mikey said that he went up to his room, leaving his poor big brother alone.

 As soon as he heard Mikey’s door closing, he got up on his feet, took a bottle of scotch out of the alcohol closet, got out of the big wooden front door and hurried to his favorite place to be alone, the local cemetery.

Gerard entered the large metal cemetery gate. It was so old, it was there for probably more than 300 years.  Gerard sat next to a big gravestone, popped open the bottle and started drinking it as fast as he could.

 “Oh, I’m sorry Mikey, please don’t be angry.” He mumbled as he was drinking. By the time he finished his bottle, his mind was completely fucked up.

“Hey watcha’ doing there buddy? Mikey won’t like it!” the big rock said to him. “Leave me you fuck! I came here to be alone!” he screamed at the rock, waving his bottle in every possible direction. The rock laughed loudly. Gerard threw the empty glass bottle on it and it finally shut up.

Gerard tried to get up, but as he did he fell to the ground, his head hitting the gravestone. He started giggling like a retard. “That’s not polite, gravy!” he laughed. “Gravy, that’s funny. That’s how I’m going to call you from now on!” he pointed at the bloody gravestone.

Gerard kept lying there, until he decided to try and get up again, but his body failed him and once again, he found himself on the ground, laughing his ass off for no fucking reason. He tried to pull his body up again, but he just passed out and fell to the ground, again. He was laying there, unconsciousness, pieces of glass and drops of blood around him. If anyone would see it, it would probably look like a murder scene.

“Gee, do you remember where I put my notebooks?” no answer was heard. “Gerard?” Mikey went downstairs; Gerard wasn’t where he left him. “Gee?! Gerard where the fuck are you????!!!!!” he kept running around the house searching for his brother. “Where the fuck did he go now…..” Mikey said, shaking his head.

 Gerard woke up in the cemetery the next morning, the blood and the glass around him. “Oh fuck….. He got up, rubbing his acing head with his hands. “What the fuck happened?” he asked himself as he saw the splashes of blood and shreds of glass that were lying around him.

He sat on the gravestone, his heart breaking, but he wasn’t crying, no. Gerard never cried, he was strong and too heroic to cry. But with all that, he was also very sensitive. He needed a release. The pain was too much for him.
He let out a loud scream, waving his arms to the sides, his heart crumbling into tiny little pieces every second.
“I HATE IT!!!! I HATE EVERYTHING!!! CAN’T STAND THIS FUCKING LIFE! FUCK OFF, FUCK EVERYONR, AND FUCK LIVING!” he yelled, kicking the bloody gravestone with his worn out converse.

“FRANK! GET YOUR ASS OVER HERE!” Mikey yelled at his phone. “I CAN’T FIND GERARD ANYWHERE!!!” Mikey was shaking and hardly breathing. “Relax Mikes!!! I’m on my way, we’ll find him.” Frank got up and hurried towards the door. He put on his old, black pair of converse. He shut the door behind him and started running towards Gerard and Mikey’s house. He was half way there when he got to the local cemetery which was between their houses. He noticed someone in the cemetery, sitting on a bloody gravestone with his head buried in his hands, blood and glass surrounding him. Wait… could it….?! OH MY GOD it IS him.

“Gerard!” frank yelled and ran towards his best friend.

Oh no, Gerard heard franks voice. He didn’t want to see him right now. The thing is, frank was one of the reasons Gerard hated living. Frank was Gerard’s best friend for about three years. They were really close, like brothers. Until one year ago, Gerard accepted the fact that he had a crush on frank. And six months ago, realized he was in love with him. But frank was straight, and had a girlfriend. Sometimes Gerard would stare at him, wondering if perhaps he liked him anyway. Nah, he knew very well it could never happen, and that’s why seeing frank hurt so bad every time.

Frank got to Gerard, panting. Gerard still didn’t bother to look up.

“What the fuck happened?! You okay Gee?” frank asked, worrying more than ever. Gerard didn’t answer. “Gee, please…” frank kneeled in front of  him and grabbed his hands, removing them from his head and holding them in his own. Gerard looked at the familiar gorgeous face; the hazel eyes, round brows, thin, beautiful lips with a lip ring on the corner and a cute nose. Frank looked worried.

“You look like shit…” frank said as he saw Gerard, who looked tired, bags under his eyes and his hair messy and wet. Gerard wasn’t surprised, how wouldn’t he look like shit after waking up in a graveyard.

 Frank moved Gerard’s hair out of his face, and placed his hands on Gerard’s shoulders, grabbing them tightly. “Will you please tell me what happened here?” frank asked.

“Nothing, everything’s okay Frank, really.” Gerard managed to choke out, smiling at Frank sadly. “Don’t bullshit me; I know you didn’t come home last night. Something is wrong.” Frank kept looking at Gerard’s smeared eyeliner. He noticed Gerard’s hair was a little wet. He put his hand on the back of Gerard’s head, and when he pulled it back he saw red sticky liquid, and it was all over the gravestone and ground as well. Frank sighed, looking at Gerard concerned. “Oh, Gee… What did you do….” He pulled him into a tight hug.

“Let’s go home and talk this over, okay?” frank asked as he let go of Gerard and got up, grabbing his arms and pulling him up as well. Frank wrapped his arm around Gerard and they were both headed towards the Way household.

so what do you guys think? thanks for reading! please leave commenets and let me know if youre reading.... should i continue?

I Lied When I Said I Was Okay (frerard)Read this story for FREE!