Hearts Of Gold

30 Lightning

"A man not liking women? How do I accept this?"

He chuckles and nudges his nose against hers. "Before you, I've never known what type of women I like. But after you, every description of you is what I like."

"Flatterer."

"For you, all my words offer are only sincerity."

She looks into his eyes and finds a million suns burning there, like some powerful display of hell— a perfect description of agony. She knows the smile on his lips is deceptive. She knows he wants to give her only sweet memories to remember him by, to compensate for his past sins, and to burn down whoever in the future might try to take his place. He has brought demolition upon every other man for her. No one can ever replace him, she's sure. Her heart isn't even hers now but his and only his, without even the concept of another man.

He takes her hand and they both get up from the blanket, slowly walking towards the shore. Her eyes reflect the sun sinking behind the horizon, like a canvas with colors in mayhem. Her gaze sails across the orange rays before finding him, his golden orbs already awaiting her dark ones, letting the contrast bewitch her.

"Were I the pale blue sea under lilac sky, would you have loved me then?"

She smiles at his words, the beach sand feeling soft beneath her feet as she steps closer to him.

"What if I say I love lightning storms in blackened nights more, would you believe me then?"

His lips pull back into a grin of his own, displaying his perfect set of teeth, but his irises shade melancholic. Every breath she takes feels charged— the air has a spark. Yet a piece of her heart remains missing, making her feel incomplete.

His agile fingers reach out to graze the back of her hand up to her wrist, holding it gently but firmly. He lightly tugs her towards himself.

"Stay, Leyla. Don't leave me."

The longing in his request only turns each of her fiber more raw, making her soul feel more sore, as she feels helpless in front of his desire. She knows she has to leave him against her will, but she also knows her wishes aren't what matters the most right now, but only what is right.

"I love you," she tells him with a pained smile. "Limitlessly. And God is only fair, for He never leaves a heart broken." She drapes her arms around his shoulders. "This time shall pass too. Our hearts will mend too."

His hands come to rest on her waist and he releases his breath unsteadily. "I love you so much that even these words don't mean enough when I say them to you. Beyond any expressions. Even beyond my actions can show." He grazes one finger down her eyebrow to her chin. "God, what is this heart? Only the Creator knows the madness inside it. So adamant." He tips up her chin. "So reckless. Why is it so hell bent on killing itself?" He leans towards her. "I've told God that you're my peace, even though He already knows. I begged Him in every prayer not to take away this peace from me. Is this a test or a punishment, qalbi?"

She threats her fingers into the hair at his nape, tugging gently. "What do you think?"

"I think a woman with a heart of gold comes as a reward, never as a punishment. But I know not of my virtue for which I've been blessed with you." He smiles and kisses her forehead. "I think our separation is my test, to prove to my Lord that I deserve you. So I'll be patient until you return again."

She mirrors his smile and places her hand over his heart, feeling it beating beneath her palm. "If it is so, then God made you mine for you have a heart of gold yourself."

"You made it so, Leyla. God made you the reason."

"And I couldn't be more grateful to be this reason, Burq."