Love & Ruins (#2)

Chapter Three

Chapter Three: Evan

The sight of the Williams Co. building is about as daunting as the last time I saw it.

Which was less than a year ago as I dropped by my parents' office to see how they were doing because ever since I moved in with Jasper, I had made no effort to come and visit them.

I had cut all forms of communication with every single person in my life including my parents as well as my friends because I was just spiraling in a long, winded existential crisis slash post-breakup meltdown. Questioning the overall path of my future and the current status of my life during that time, wallowing over Maggie's departure.

I still remember the same bewildered expressions of the employees that day when I had walked into the company. I was still in the middle of my grieving process so I gave no shits whatsoever about how I looked, even if it meant showing up only in a grease-stained hoodie and sweatpants that I wore for three days straight, so beat it.

They were eyeing me up and down, reluctant about whether or not they should trust me when I told them that I was the son of Tiffany and Mason Williams and not just some guy who got run over by a dumpster truck, walked into the building, and was probably just hallucinating.

It wasn't until my parents had to go down and confirm that it was indeed me, their son, but even they themselves had to do a double-check and examine the state I was in at that time, shocked as well of how I came to be.

Their concern for me amplified tenfold after seeing my condition, asking how I was doing and how they've missed me. Alluding to my lack of effort in reaching out to them.

I felt guilty because though the reason why I visited them was to see how they were doing, I also dropped by because I wanted to ask them if they could pay my rent for me due to how I had run out of allowance money.

Which they were more than accepting about, however, that didn't stop them from trying to convince me to just move back in with them, but I declined by saying that I needed the space to be myself alone, and also because I had spent the majority of my savings on alcohol, getting into exclusive clubs, and paying for hotels to hook up in if I was too far away from home.

But of course, I didn't tell them about that, because chances were they were only gonna enable their strict parenting mode and force me to go see a psychiatrist, which I wasn't ready for despite how I was clearly going through a rough patch both emotionally and mentally.

I'm not someone who downplays someone's circumstances when their mental health is going downhill, I've always believed that no matter what, a person's reasons for going through a mental burnout deserve treatment and to be sympathized with.

However, on behalf of my case, I believed that my reasons weren't worth professional treatment because, in my eyes, it was just a breakup. I had believed it was just going to look silly and that my situation wasn't crucial for me to seek any sort of treatment.

Even when Jasper suggested the idea on multiple occasions, reassuring me that it was not stupid and that I at least needed to try.

But I didn't wanna burden anyone. It was already enough I was stopping myself from going to college in New York considering my perception of that place got ruined because of the plans I made with Maggie to move in the same apartment and whatnot.

That, as well as the possibility of her being there. I knew if I went to New York I was just gonna do anything but focus on my studies and instead prioritize searching for her.