Starman | BTS 8th Member | *ੈ✩‧₊˚(editing)

18.

it was a few days till Halloween and my excitement was evident.

But the looming prospect that today I must hand in all my songs, finished or not really ruined my mood

I figured id just rewrite them in neatest my neat handwriting which would be difficult. I invision my hands cramping as soon as i pick up a pen. Next place them in a folder on yoongi's desk. Then, disappear for the rest of the day. Or year. Depends.

My handwriting was proving a problem. I've always had a problem with such things. My hands shake when i write so the more i move down the page the more im in pain. So sometimes I'd rather not write at all.

We were first having a dance practice, we had recorded a demo of the song, the track was complete, we just needed to all sing our lines which I'm happy to say is in a few weeks.

Meaning i can sleep soundly until exactly a week before.

Only jungkook and hoseok had seen me dancing other than when i first joined. So it was daunting that i must keep sync with all of them. But today we would mostly practice pre-existing songs.

I had been a trainee before , hell i was even in a group before the attempt of murder on one of the members.

But i never had this much pressure bestowed on me before. The members are more skilled than me, and i must do 3-5 years catching up.

When the live went up, my twitter has been full off all kinds of comments. Some were nice for example:

omg jisungie you're so cute Or jisungie you're so cool.

The name "jisungie" makes me want to cry i hate it. I bite my fist everytime i see it.

But as much as they are nice. They don't stay. The comments are wonderful, but the others stay. They rot inside your head and they never seem to leave.

"I don't like him bighit made a mistake""I bet bts don't even like him"

Comments such as theses are tame, so tame that i sometimes go looking for them to laugh at.

-

I made my way to dance practice wanting to go as slow as possible. So i dont mind taking the longer route. So no back alleys for now.

I was still slightly peeved off at having to wake up so early, so i thought not alot of people would be outside the building, causing trouble.

We had been ordered not to talk to them. Not like i wanted to, the ones who stand outside are weirdos. Why are you an adult, waiting for me, an adult, to go inside and go to work.

Weird.

They liked blocking the entrance and start screaming. Like i said. Weird.
I spotted jimin pushing through the crowd of people so i latched onto him as he cleared through.

He gave me a smirk as we finally got into the building.
"mental" he muttered, as we started to ascend the staircase.

We reached the room and peering through the glass pane in the door to see strange scene. we opened the door slowly, the voices of the members could be heard as we entered. The room was in utter chaos.

Jungkook was in the corner with all the chairs, sitting like a child in time out and jin glowered at him from the other side of the room.

Hoseok was singing a slow mournful song, in tribute to what seemed like a piece of rubbish on the floor.