Chapter Fifteen

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I avoided eye contact as I walked into the studio, I still hadn't decided if the dinner Dan and I had Tuesday was classified as a date or an outing. I set my bag down in the chair and looked at the two in the recording area.

"Do you guys want anything?" I asked.

"Yes," Phil smirked, "Dan wants something from you."

Dan looked ready to attack. I raised my eyebrows and looked at Dan, who's face was getting redder by the second.

"What is it that you want Daniel?" I asked, "Water, bagel..."

"Virginity," Phil blurted.

"Excuse me?" I covered a gasp with a cough. Shit, no. Just to make my day even better. Right before work my mom called and blew up for no reason, god, she made me cry. I finally calmed down for work.

"Dan watched all of your videos last night," Phil laughed, "He saw one about a q and a-"

"Phil, I understand that we're good friends but this is really not appropriate for the workplace," I said, "It's unprofessional and I really feel like that shouldn't be discussed even if we weren't at work. Alright, I do have a big thing for Dan, and I have for a while. I said stupid things to a whole bunch of people thinking it was funny, but it is embarrassing three years later. I'm sorry Dan, I didn't want to tell you this way or this early and I shouldn't have said that."

"You told the internet- the whole world-" he laughed, "That you would give up your virginity to Dan Howell! How stupid are you?"

"Phil!" Dan snapped.

Tears pricked in my eyes as I recalled the discussion from earlier.

"You could never get your own radio show, Gwen, you're just a stupid little girl who doesn't have a clue what she's doing."

I huffed and picked up my bag again, I put it over my shoulder and walked out. I quickly walked home, slamming the door shut. I slung my bag onto the couch and shrank down into a ball.

I cried, okay? I cried a whole lot. For a few reasons.

1) My mom is a bitch to me all the time

2) My best friend made fun of me in a cruel way

3) I was a stupid teenager who should not be on the internet

4) I'm on my period

5) I just admitted to my long-term crush/ best friend that I really liked him

Who knows what that will do! He might think our whole friendship was based off of me trying to date him, which it wasn't! I tried to date other people while we have been friends and he knows that. So thanks Phil. You may not have just ruined my friendship with Dan, but you sure have ruined ours.

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