"You know, I think it looks even prettier on my finger than around my neck." I laid with Alec in our bed at home, my head laying on his bare chest, sheets covering our bare bodies, the only light kit being the flames from the fire, as we looked at the shining diamond ring on my finger.
"I can't say I disagree." Alec's finger dragged up and down my arm, keeping me as close as ever, "Especially since it means you said yes to being a Lightwood."
"I feel like Zee Lightwood has a nice ring to it." I moved so I could face him, putting a hand on his face, "I only said yes for the name."
"Oh, I figured-" Alec pursed his lips to hold back his laughter, "Knew you never loved me-"
"Not one bit." I booped his nose, "I was after the name this entire time- had you fooled."
Alec softly laughs, pushing some hair out of my face, "I love you so much."
"And I love you." I tilted my head to the side lightly, my expression softening, my voice quieting, "How do you do that?"
Alec grabs my free hand, "Do what?"
"Love me regardless." I stared at him, my eyes locked with his, "After all I've done."
Alec took that hand and placed it over his heart so I feel his heart beating, "Because you're my heart."
"Alec." I couldn't help but softly smile, then lightly shake my head, "I'm being serious-"
Alec's eyes were filled with joy and sincerity, a small smile playing at his lips, "So am I-"
"I've hurt you so much." I stare at him, my expression fading to guilt, "The looks on your face whenever I said those- awful things-"
Alec squeezes my hand, "It wasn't you."
"It doesn't matter-" I lightly shook my head, "I don't know how to come back from everything I've done-"
"If Jace can come back, you can." Alec said to me, "And I know you will."
"I don't know-" I sigh lightly, laying my head back down in the crook of his neck, "I messed everything up- the only reason Jonathan got his hands on the Morning Star is because I helped him- and now? Magnus is gone- he sacrificed himself fixing my mistake."
"You need to stop blaming yourself." Alec ran his fingers through my hair, "If it weren't for the rune, you wouldn't have done any of it."
"I guess so." My voice got quiet, "I don't know- it almost feels wrong having the wedding without Magnus."
"He's the one who convinced me to come to your wedding- he knew you'd choose me- and now he's not here to see me marry you?" I swallowed hard at the thought, "It doesn't feel right."
"I know, I know it hurts- but, we both know that he can't ever come back." Alec reminded me with a sigh, "The rift would reopen and all of Edom would come back with him-"
"I'm going to find a way." I stared ahead, drawing shapes on his chest, "And I'm going to get him back."
I slowly walked into Magnus' apartment, looking around, my heart aching at the scent I was so familiar with.
I walked into the living room, looking at his shaker for his margaritas, making me sigh quietly, flashbacks of all the times I've been Magnus make drinks filling my mind.