Chapter Ten

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Ok, so I was very sleepy while writing this whole chapter.  If there is any horrible horrible spelling or grammar mistakes I'm sorry. Like I said, I am sleepy and I also don't have my best buddy grammarly to help me out. Only my teeny tiny brain and my blurry vision XD

Song: Snow by Ricky Montgomery 
(been obsessed with Ricky Montgomery songs, they slapppp)

Awkward wasn't something I usually felt. Don't get me wrong I've been in plenty of awkward situations, but in those I always managed to create some form of humour and well- make it not awkward. Maybe because of all those years I spent holding up the large sense of false confidence to deceive those that continued to belittle Shinsou, I forgot how weird it was to let my guard down. To not be protecting him right now from hurtful comments, feels weird to me in all honesty. I'm so used to only thinking of him- god that sounds like he's the only thing on my mind.

But everything was just...always tense not awkward. 

This though? This is so fucking awkward. I stand sandwiched between WingyLimbs and Canada  while the green glow of the screens from the gigantic monitoring room hits all of us, creating this soft light along our skin.

We aren't speaking, we haven't said a word since I made that starter conversation which sunk faster than the titanic. I was trying hard to not be so embarrassed by my failure and just focus on the up coming task I'll be faced with.

Looking back and forth at my teammates I realize I should probably figure out their actual names and not call them by their cursed nicknames I claimed them with in my head.
I clear my throat to capture their attention away from the current battle going down on the monitors. Slowly WingyLimbs turns his head to stare down at me, it was only then I realized how much taller he is than my puny body. Refusing myself to get intimidated, I smile up at him. "Hey uh, I don't think I every found your name out. Mind lettin' me know?" 

Slowly the limb with a mouth attached on the end moves upwards. I force my face to remain neutral, I felt it would be rude if my facial expression changed, make him feel unwelcome. 
In a hushed tone the mouth answers my awaiting question, "Mezo Shoji."

My smile brightens when the name hits my ears, I repeat the name in my head a couple times before looking up into his eyes that were almost hidden in the shadows of his hair. "It's a pleasure to meet you Shoji! I'm Y/n L/N." The mouth limb smiles in return at my own. The tall extra-limbed man gives a small nod before slowly turning his attention back to the many monitors in front of us.

I glance over at Canada who still hasn't spoken a word, or maybe his expression spoke louder. I wasn't sure if he was annoyed or if he just had a resting bitch face- but I try not to let that bother me as I gently nudge his side with my elbow,

"And what about you?"

"Excuse me?" His icy stare is now on me- ok, he definitely looks pissed off.. "Y-Your name..?" I stammer like an idiot in front of him, it makes me want to internally kick myself for such a thing. There's this long quiet pause of just eyes staring at each other. More like him staring at me and me trying desperately to maintain eye contact but ending up looking everywhere but his face.

"Todoroki Shoto."

 A small smile weasels its way to my face, "It's a pleasure to meet you, Todoroki. I hope we can become good friends." I stick my hand out for him to shake, but he simply stares at it and scoffs. Todoroki turns his attention back to the current battle.

"It would do you well L/N if you paid attention and not try to do something as useless as befriend people."

My eyes rounded at his words, mouth turning dry in response. I swallow hard and let my shoulders slump down. To be fair, he is right, I'm supposed to be paying attention for my own upcoming battle but of course I'm not. Maybe I'm taking the Hero Course for granted, Shinsou definitely wouldn't if he was here. If Shinsou was here he would never let his eyes leave the monitors, he would analyze everything the current teams are doing.

I feel a large hand roughly pat my shoulder, my eyes trail to whoever is doing so, landing on Shoji. I smile calmly up at him, I think I could be good friends with Shoji. He's quiet but at least he isn't grumpy like ol' Todo over there. My eyes travel back to Todoroki though, he must take schooling and hero work very seriously. He seems like a serious person, just the vibe he gives off.

With a sigh I focus my attention back to the battle screen- and holy shit what the hell have I been missing?! One whole side of the building that the Hero and Villain teams has been fighting in, had completely been blown off.

My jaw hangs open, wow I zone out too much. As the spiky blonde hair with grenades on his fists causes a huge explosion in the curly green haired boys face, it causes almost all the windows in the building to shatter. All of the glass shards and particles fly every which way, at the same time the Spacey girl from before- the one with the zero gravity quirk- lifts an entire beam, uses it as a baseball back to hit flying dibris at the Zoom Zoom Guy and manages to grab a hold of the giant fake nuclear missile.

 I'm looking around in a frantic manner, my confusion and concern levels rise. My eyes meet with Denki, who equally looks as frantic as me. We're both in a complete awe and silence.

AllMight finally speaks into the mic when Broccili boy over here collapses, "Your indoor combat training is over." He says in his usual powerful voice. I could feel the tiredness and wave of relief coming from that building from here.

"The Hero Team," AllMight starts, his smiling large and pronounced as ever, "WINNNNSSSSSS"

"What a weird way for this to end, the losers are practically untouched, and the winners are both on the ground..."

Not only that, but I can't help but take notice of BombBoys facial expression. He looks distant and way too in the moment all at once.

"How does the old saying go?" I turn my attention towards the guy with a Birb for a head, "They may have lost the battle but they have won the war."

"This class is intense" Frogger girl states, I nod in agreement, "You're telling me... honestly I completely zoned out in it..." I scratch the back of my neck nervously. Denki laughs, "Of course you did."

I just stick my tongue out at him playfully, he does the same back. I was uncomfortable with him before, but I shouldn't be. Nothing a friend does should make me uncomfortable, right? 

The lights of the room are flicked on, the injured green haired boy is rolled away- most likely too the Nurses Office. Spiky blonde was taken back into the monitoring room along with Spacey and Mister Zoom. 

AllMight towers over us all, announcing something unexpected, "Well despite the results, the MVP of this exercise, is young Iida!"

Iida...? Iida?? Who- I look around trying to pin the name to one of the three people that were in the previous battle. I eventually place the name to Mister Zoom. Oh right! He introduced himself to me on the first day. God I'm so bad at remembering. 

All Might and the others begin to discuss why Iida would be the MVP and not one of the heros, honestly I could care less. I wasn't curious nor did it matter to me who the MVP was. Shinsou would care, he would be all about this stuff. Shinsou should really be here instead of me.

Guilt began to bear down on me, guilt and shame of getting into the Hero Course and Shinsou not being able to. This was his dream, his dream to stop being the villian almost everyone in his life sorted him in to the category of. 

My skin prickles and a small smile stretches on my face realizing  how much I truly admire this boy. I'm giving him a big hug when I next see him. No matter how hard I've tried over the years, trying to protect him, trying to be his hero... He's always been mine. 

"Heyyy, earth to L/N, you in there?"

And with that I'm snapped back into reality, once again. I look over at Kaminari, my smile twitching slightly. I decide internally to really start focusing and analyzing the battles before my own. It's what Shinsou would do. 

____

"How long are you gonna keep kicking the lamp post? Can I go home now?"

"NO!"

I release the rest of my rage out on the metal pole that helps light up the roads late at night, why am I angry you ask? Oh, because Todoroki is an uncooperative asshole!

"He did it all Shinsou! All!"

"Mhm."

"JUST WOOSHHH!"

"Uhuh."

"AND I STOOD THERE LIKE A DUMBASS."


"Interesting."

I suck in the insides of my cheeks and snap my head over in the direction of Shinsou, who was just keeping his eyes on his phone, not paying attention to me at all. I make my frown very over dramatic and evident, "Shinsouuuu, put your phone away! Aren't I more important?"

"...no?"

"You're a dick sometimes ya know that?"

"I wear that title with pride." 

Shinsou finally looks up at me, giving me this shit eating grin that I both want to smack off his face with the help of my school bag and laugh with him. 
With a roll of my eyes I stick myself to his side, locking our arms and begin walking home with him. "How was class?"

"Meh."

"No juicy details?"

"No juicy details."

"No fun." I lean more of my weight against him, a small smile quirking on my lips. We walk in silence after that, silence between us could never be uncomfortable. People always need a conversation to be kept up, always need the other to entertain and that becomes too exhausting. Shinsou and I don't need that to enjoy spending time with each other, we are perfectly content with enjoying each others company- even if we have nothing to say. His presence is enough. 

"Wanna go for a run tomorrow morning?" I ask once we turn on to our street. The air felt hot and sticky, I'd never get used to the heat here no matter how long I live. Shinsou gives a nod in return, "If you can get your ass out of bed, sure."

"WAH! What makes you think I can't?!"

"Would you like to me to list off my reasons?"

"Will they make me sad?"

"Most definitely"

"Shush."

The purple haired boy throws his head back letting out a laugh, he's always enjoyed teasing me like this. It's always in good fun so I know he never really means what he says. I roll my eyes letting out a small giggle myself. 

We stop walking when we reach the in between of our houses, mine of the right and his on the left. Staring at his home I smile prickly, I felt as if I could already smell the fresh baked goods from Mihoko and hear the chatter that would ensue once Shinsou enters the home. 

"You can come in if you want." Shinsou states after a while, "Mom would never mind."
I laugh gently, forcing my elongated stare away from the beautiful house with a beige outside and perfectly aligned shingles on the roof. "I know," I stare up at Shinsou, "I have homework though, Maybe I'll stop by after?"

"Of course." Shinsou breathes out, his eyes search mine, looking for something. Shinsou was trying to read me like a book, read me and understand each and every meaning of it's words, of it's importance. I glance away quickly, even if I wanted to stare into his eyes and admire him longer.

"See ya later Shinnn!" I hum grinning and skipping off to my own house, a pale blue house with perfectly aligned shingles. A house as beautiful as Shinsou's, even in all it's magnificent grace it all seems like a cover up.

This house could never be called home.

My fingers hesitantly curl around the door handle, the paint was chipping a little, revealing the metal  underneath... or maybe it was brass. I wasn't too sure, and I don't think I'll ever really find out, I twist it, pushing the door open and expecting the screams.
It was silent. 

Silence was a blessing but, the heaviness of the lack of sound makes my skin itch and the hair on the back of my neck stand up. Shutting the door behind me, I race up the stairs before the screaming match does end up starting. 

This could never be a home, especially in this blissful silence that flows through every hallway, every room, it follows like a shadow. Just...hovering, there, stalking. 

I think I prefer the fighting.


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