The Things They Don't Tell You

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The creaky double doors to the school were heavier then I remembered. And what came after them was worse, crowded halls filled with teenagers, happy, sad, emo, every kind you could think of. It was like a chick flick and I felt like the main character.

People whispered and side eyed as I walked past, it had been 3 months since the accident and this was my first proper public appearance since. It still burnt deep inside of me, I thought about the accident every second, the weeks me and sabe spent in the hospital, the sea of black fabric at the funeral.

I snapped myself out of it, no matter how much I dwelled on the past things couldn't change. I just had to focus on getting through the year and then I could move away from this shit down for good. 
~
Photography was my dream, basic? I know. But there was something about being able to take a picture of a moment and having every emotion you felt bundled up into that one shot.

It felt like the only magic in this less than desirable universe.

My first class was anatomy and physiology. I had mainly chosen health related topics, the idea of the mechanisms of the body enticed me, and by that I mean it was better then having to act out a play in drama or do some weird spins in a dance class. And bedsides, knowing how hallucinogens worked wasn't half bad.

Lunch came around quicker than expected, and the pounding feet of October scared me as I turned around and that red haired girl that was my only life source in this school was running towards me.

"Hello stranger!" She exclaimed as I wrapped my arms around her. "It seems like a lifetime" I replied kissing her on the forehead and heading to our usual spot near the pine trees.

It wasn't a usual friendship to us, we didn't grow up together or live next door. We had met last year and things kicked off like that. October had a dream boat childhood, the perfect family, the lake house, all the money she could dream of, but despite that she was rebellious. She relied on guys to make her feel alive, she was twisted, but so am I.

I guess it goes to show money really doesn't buy happiness.

I handed her a bond street and shared the light. The grey cloud of cigarette smoke surrounded us and we got to talking, "How's your head?" She asked, she always knew how much too push. And this was the best question I had gotten since the accident. "It's been better, but not as bad as it was, I'm definitely getting somewhere" I replied with a smile.

"Let's meet tonight be at mine at like 7? I have so much to fill you in on!" She jumped excitedly. "You know I'll be there" and with that we headed our own ways.

"Okay so I don't want to say I met the one because that's kinda cringe and also cliche, buttttt I met someone. And Hadley let me tell you, he is so different to anyone I've ever been with" she seemed excited but nervous in a good way.

"You know I'm happy for you! Where's he from? What's his name? Give me the deets" I was happy for her, October really did deserve that go happy life and if she found someone that can do that good for her.

She went on talking about this guy, Luke, he was from the other side of town and went to college in the city. They had met online and to her surprise he didn't catfish her. She talked for a solid hour about her new man and we laughed about the details of her summer.

She didn't bring up my parents, and I appreciated that. Hours later I said my goodbyes and headed home.

Okay so the first day wasn't so bad! Only like the whole of the school year to go. How hard can it be right?