what does love know about me.

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Aquarium                      CHAPTER #1

People were right when they said time flys.  It scares me the way that sometimes I can't recall what happened last week or the other day.

  I realize that I'm not like most people.  I will probably never find someone to love me. 

I will never find the meaning of life or why I was even put on this earth. My name is Ayva Alexis Anthoney. 

I will tell you some facts about my life.

~I'm a girl

~I haven't been back to school in 2 years

~I have cancer

~I'm in love

When you know your going to die. 

You wonder what's on the other side. 

For a long time I tried to figure that out. 

When I found out that  I only had 2 more months to live.

  I decided to write a book.

If your wondering my time is almost up and I'm sitting in the hospital room by myself. 

Both my parents are working to provide for my 2 other sisters.

  I feel lonely but what will happen when I'm gone?

  If they start to forget me now they won't miss me later.

  This book is not about being depressed and alone. 

It's about love and living your life to its fullest because when it comes down to a point. 

What would you rather Be doing before you die?

Work?

Party?

Do illegal things?

Be depressed?

Be happy?

I guess it's your decision but honesty in my 2 months. 

I've done and been all of thoughs things.

               CHAPTER #2

I was 7 when I was diagnosed with my cancer.

  I was slowly dying and everyone around me knew it. 

For the longest time I knew but I decided to look at it in a different way. 

I decided to see it as not an ending but my new beginning. 

2 months ago my doctor told me how long I had to live and I knew I had to change. 

Not change who I am but my life. 

I wanted my family and friends and everyone to know that when I'm dead that they can move on because that's what I've already done. 

I figure when I'm gone they will be free from the prison I have set them all in. 

This sad,

dying,

crumbling,

and emotional,

prison.

  I have not done everything I've wanted in my life. 

For I am only 13 years old. 

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