Part21

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Sana look at his eyes and nod her head in assurances.........,
Sid adjust her in his left side ............ her head was on his chest and his hand was under her head............
Sid sigh.........
Sid: naaaz........( he paused and sigh....... Sana just rub her hand on his chest for his calm..........
Sid: i was just 8 year old...... when my mom........

Sid voice tremble......... sana look at him ........ his face show pain ...... immense pain...... Sana kiss him on his chest ......... to calm him........ and hug him tightly............ Sid was feeling secured .......... yes secured...... because on this time ........ he was not a mature ......... hard ....... arrogant....... heartless person............ at this moment........... he was heartbroken.......
defeated........ a baby........ delicate hearted ..........,,,, so he need her......., yes her ........ his  wife......,,, his naaz
............ whom he say ..... he don't love her.......,, but he is going to share the most painful past......... his past......... which he didn't share with any one ............ that past which he didn't even want to face or remind again to himself ................. he has no courage.......... but yes he is going to share with a girl ......... whom he doesn't love........... so strange Sidhart.........

Some time we didn't realize......... feelings......... importance........ emotions.......... for some one.......... as our heart didn't realize it.......... some time we are connected with souls........... and connection of souls is not love ........... it's ishq ........... we realized love  soon....... but we didn't realized ishq.......... it takes time........ even it takes lives......... it's dangerous than love......... but it's most pure form of love............

Sid: my mom....... she left me ...... my father....... for other..... man....... he was ..... so rich naa...... to as lia......
He was speaking each word with a lot of difficulties.......... Sana was caressing his chest......... try to enlighten his pain......,,,,,,
Sid: I was standing out of mom dad room........I was listening their fights.......she was saying..........
" I don't want to live with you..... tm na mga diya hi kia hA..........  yah chota sa ghr......... rrr kia dia tm na....... aus ka pass sab kuch hA......... I don't want to ruin my life any more"
Dad asked her that we have a child...... me ......... but she said..... " I want to enjoy my life........ I don't want any burden.......... you can take him with him...... or else send him to boarding or any orphanage........ I don't want even him"

Sana was feeling his pain ......... if his face was wet with his tears......... then his shirt was wet with her tears......... both was crying.........

Sid: I suffered a lot naaz......... a lot....... i was child.,,....... I needed love of mother......... people use to curse me...... abuse me about my mother......
I had a very biter childhood......... my father was also broken.......... he always used to cry holding me near him........ he was very engrossed in work all the day .......... he used to cane late at night.......... I was alone all the time...... some time my i went to my neighbors........ they give sympathies ....... strange sympathies........ which actually pierced my heart....... they also asked me to do their house work......... which I also done....... for lunch........ some time for some chips that they used to made for their children......,,,,,,,,, dad was busy in his work ........... he determined to become rich......... because he want to show mom ....... this world....... but he forgot about me......... 4 years was worst years of my life.......... those 4 years snatch my innocence...... kindness...... my childhood........ my softness..... my each and every thing........ then dad married Rita mom....... she is kind women..... she care for me......... but I can't close with her.......... I was gone very far from love care etc......... I became too hard........ even at the age of 12 ........... I always keep my self away from any emotions......... this hardness , arrogance was building with me ...........  even when my father died I felt no emotions........ I was 19 then.......people suffocate me enough......... taunt me enough....... abuse me enough........ broke me enough.......... life was too bitter for me ......... people make it more bitter......... in result I become most bitter person ...........
I was 22 when I start business....... I started with my father small business which was at immense loss at that time.......... I had no experience .............But I work hard........ not just for success......... I want to take control  over these cruel world....... like they control my life.......
I become a successful businessman......... but still not at top ............ I was at 26 when I met Sneha..........my business friend sister.............
( Sid paused........Sana heart missed a beat.......... Sneha......... kia....... so many things In her heart......)

Sid: she was young beautiful........ very bold......... at first meeting she came a hug me......... ( he smile painfully) she mingle with every one with every one...... but her attitude was also i the other level........after first meeting........ she used to come in my office....... even in my house....... after some days ......... we used to go for outings....... date etc........... I was not use to of love and care......... but she  buildup desires in me............ we are at sitting at beach when she kiss me ........... it was my first kiss........
( Sana knows his playful nature....... but the words that he just said........ hurt her.......she knew he didn't love her ....... but still...,,..,it was now unbearable for her to listen love story of your love........)

i didn't know about my feelings.......... then she said she loves me........... her confession rise a new light in my life.......... that I have a some one to love me............ I was beyond happy......... I was feeling at cloud nine........ our desires was rising day by day........ we are getting close day by day....... very close......... ( he paused......., and shut his eyes........ Sana understand what does it means........ she also shut her eyes)
We make love every day......... but I not get enough of this............ she was become my addiction ........... it was almost 4 month of our relationship......... I was feeling that she start ignoring me......... usually she pick my call at two or three rings........ but then she start to ignore my calls ........me even ......... she said she was busy ........ I have to understand......... something......... I was feeling that may be I was thinking to much ............ it was 2 weeks she didn't contact me ........... I was at Dubai then ........... I used to call a lot but..... then I called my manager........ and tell him to go to Sneha house ........ and informed her about me ......... and about her to me....... he called me that she was went to London .........I also had to go to London ......... I was happy that I also can meet her ........ and spent some quality time with her.......... when I reached London in morning .......... I had a meeting in evening......... In a well known famous hotel ........... I was in meeting when I saw her ......... I became happy....... but at very next moment I saw a man with her ........... holding her waist ......... I didn't mind at first as o know her nature......... but at very next moment Sneha kiss him ..... very boldly......... I can't control my self and went there............ i call her name....... with anger....... she broke her kiss and look at me........,, you know she was not guilty at all...,,,,,,, I let go that things........... I said" I missed you Sneha" she said in return ........ " meet my faience Saqi sharma" I was shocked...... surprised......... hurt.......I said to her that you are joking but ....,..., she excuse herself from Saqi sharma and take me out ......... she said
" I am bored of you know.......... I thought it was just of attraction  between us.......... forget this ....... you know my faience is  richest man in London......... I just love him.......bye"
Again I was ditched by life ........... same reasons.......... I drink A lot at that night......... in club......... I was became like before .......... only addition was this  night stand ......... for my pleasure........ my satisfaction........... before Sneha I was just worse........, but after her I became more worse........ too much.......
( he shut his eyes frustratedly......... Sana didn't say any thing.........)
Tell me it's my fault........ haa bolaaa..... meri galtii ha......mana kia begara tha kesi ka bola na........ ma bura hu ..... mga kis na bura banaya......
( he was now sobbing......... crying like a child........ sana snuggles him more....... to calm him....... but he was complaining about his miserable state........about his miserable life........)
Sana: shhhh...... plZzzz Sidhart...... chup ho Jae......... plz......
(but he was not stopping............... it was tears , sobs of 24 years of his life...........which he was now shedding...........)
Sana didn't know what to do .....,,. She kept her lips on his......... and kiss him......... he felt her lips and starts kissing her......... deeply........ dominating........ first softly.....,, later aggressively .......... Sana didn't know what to do....... she was trying but failing continuously .......... when they separate both are breathing heavily but Sana condition was more worse then Sid.........Sid laugh at her........
Sid: you ..... you don't.... even know how to kiss........ Hahahhaha ( he said between his breaths ...... while laughing at her)
Sana was hell embarrassed......... firstly she initiated kiss when she didn't know about how to ..........
Sana: it ..... it ..... was my first na..... ( she said with cute pout)
Sid: I know ........( he came near her and said huskily) I will teach you ........
Sana was red like tomato..........
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Log sab hi Acha hota hai......Pr khuda kesi pa bura waqt na laya..........
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