that's life » s. hyde

[41] izzy says cheese

Izzy Says Cheese

Izzy sat at the breakfast table, watching her father and brother fight over the last waffle. She could very well just get up and make some more for the boys, but she chose to entertain herself rather than see them happy.

"Hey." Eric said. "Leggo my Eggo."

"Hey." Red responded. "Leggo my foot in your ass." Red took the waffle, leaving Eric frowning.

Izzy laughed. "Eric, you want me to make more?"

"No." He sighed dramatically. "It's okay."

Kitty then came through the kitchen door, returning from her early shift at the hospital. "Good morning! Ooh, Eric, Isabelle, I brought you two some things back from the hospital." She paused and fished around in her purse, pulling out a grape lollipop and an orange one. "Lollipops!"

Eric took the grape one and, scowling, said, "Mom, we're... seventeen years old."

Izzy nodded. "Yeah!" She leaned over to her brother and whispered, "Can I have the grape?"

"Yeah, here ya go."

"Thanks."

"Course."

Kitty turned back to her purse. "And, I also bought you two-" she pulled out two baggies. "Condoms!"

Izzy's eyes widened. "Mama!"

"Mom!"

"Now, see, we had a teenage mom come in today. And it's just... well, I worry about you two."

"That I'll get pregnant?" Eric asked.

Izzy nodded. "I don't plan on getting any girls pregnant."

"Mom, you're not a very good nurse."

"Now don't be porky mouths! Oh, here-" She pulled out two booklets. "Sexual health pamphlets."

"Mama! Ew!"

"I just want you two to know that intercourse is a responsibility, not just a right."

Eric turned to Izzy and lowered his voice. "Have you and Hyde..."

"No! You're still single, right?"

"Yes!" Eric stood up from the table. "Okay, Mom. Well. This couldn't be more uncomfortable-"

"You forgot your condoms."

"I was wrong!" Eric and Izzy quickly grabbed the bags and rushed out of the room.

-

"Hey, Izzy Bee." Hyde said, leaving his room to see his girlfriend, along with Kelso and Eric, hanging out in the basement. "Your dad's been spot-checking my room again. I can't believe he still doesn't trust me. You know, that really hurts." He turned to Eric, who was sitting on the back of the couch. "Forman, I'm gonna need you to hide my stash."

Eric shrugged and took the brown bag. "Sure. I'll put it in my dresser under my Hong Kong Phooey socks. He can protect anything because he's faster than the human eye!" He faked karate chops at Hyde, who laughed and did them back.

Izzy shook her head. "You guys are idiots. Anyway, shouldn't I take it? Daddy's less likely to suspect me-"

"Isabelle, Isabelle, Isabelle." Kelso said, clapping a hand on her shoulder.

"Don't call me that."

"Isabelle, Isabelle, Isabelle." Eric said, clapping a hand on her other shoulder. "Leave the dirty work to us... manly men."