All i can do is not enough

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7 months later


I been threw hell and back i still haven't found my kids and on top of that im 9 months pregnant so i can't help as much i want to Lamar has been here and i love him even more he's been gon allot though trying to find the girls idk how he thinks he's gonna do that but he says he knows what he's doing.

JayD is back and i made sure he doesnt leave my side he goes everywhere with me he ask about the girls an everytime i tell him their on a trip like he was then he ask's when are they coming back an i say soon.

I miss the girls to death but i know i need to stop stressin every time i go to my appointments they tell me im gonna lose my baby if i dont stop stressing and the risk get's higher and higher when lamar heard that he put my ass on lock down but i plan on getting out of the house today with jayD while he's gon.

I just got him out the bath and my back was killing me from bending over i got him lotioned and dressed i got some of the toys he likes and put them in my room and locked the door i do this all the time when Lamar not here so i know he's ok.

I got in the shower for a while then got out i lotioned my body and sprayed perfume then got dressed i got jayD and strapped him in the car and drove to a ice cream shop i got him out and walked to the counter

Me: what you want

Yea i know what kind he likes but he likes allot  so i never know what kind he wants cause its always different

JayD: umm superman

Me: can i have a small superman in a cup and a medium strawberry

"Yes that'll be $5.50"

I have her a ten and she gave me my change

"Is this your son"

Me: yes

"He's so cute and congratulations on the new one your huge"

Me: yea i know

"If you dont mind me asking what are you having"

Me: idk i wanted it to be a surprise but i might go and find out soon

I really didnt know what i was having it was gonna be a surprise but i dont got time for that

"Well im gonna let you get to your ice cream before it melts by cutie"

She said to me but the last part to jayD he smiled and turned his head i laughed and we sat at the place and finished our ice cream when we were in the car i started talking to jayD on our way to the store.

Me: what you think your gonna have a little brother or sister

JayD: sister

Me: a sister why not a brother

I looked in the mirror and seen him shrug

Me: you already got 2 sisters

JayD: i know but i like havin sisters

Me: well i guess well find out

Lamar called me and said he was on his way to the house and i told him we weren't there and he was mad talkin about he told me not to leave and all this i told him we were fine and hung up when we got to the store i got him some clothes and shoes then went back to the house.

I got the bags out and took them inside i got my phone out and called the doctors office

"Hello is the sarah how may i help you"

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