Poems collection -Self harm (trigger warning)

Eaten Alive

I can feel him,

Controlling my arm,

Jagged lines on my leg,

Spelling AXH.

-

No one'll know

What that means.

It means the world to me,

A world of torture.

-

He's telling me no,

He's telling me stop,

He's telling me die,

He's wanting me dead.

So I shall obey.

-

He destroyed my heart,

Cell by cell,

There's nothing left.

I can't feel,

I can't smile,

I've forgotten how.

I'm  thrashing

Around inside,

But on the  outside,

There's a horrible mask,

And its name is AU.

-

Stupid name,

Stupid boy,

Stupid logic,

Stupid power,

But overwhelmingly strong.

He's got my under his arm,

I can't move.

-

I'm captivated by his reasoning,

His insults his snarls.

I'll follow him,

I have no more will power,

Left to fight him off.

-

So goodbye and hello,

I'm here but I'm dead,

As Rachel Taylor sings,

"I'm alive but I'm not

Living."

29/12/14