Chapter Eight; Telling the Truth

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I earned myself a smile from those pink lips. Mhmm those lips… I could think of some much better things to do with a mouth that pretty. No, Beck! Dirty thoughts! Bad thoughts!

He switched off the lights and walked back to the bunk bed. Thanks to day light saving time, the stars shone brightly inside on his body as he stripped his shirt. His tattoo glistened. My mouth watered as he looked back at me biting his lip cutely.

“Do you mind if I just sleep in boxers?” He asked innocently. I swallowed hard and shook my head. He gave me a sly smile and removed his pants before he slid into his bed. I shook my head.

He was doing this on purpose. He noticed me staring and now he’s laying it on thick. I mentally face palmed myself.

I mean, I can’t help it! My heart is playing Lady Gaga music over here!

I shouldn’t be so jumpy here. I don’t have a crush on Emery. I’m not even gay.

I stood, pulling off my shirt. My pants had dried because we had never changed, so I decided to just sleep in those. My mouth was dry as I tucked myself into bed next to him. It wasn’t late, only about 8:30, but I suddenly found myself tired. I felt tense with him beside me though.

“Beck?” Emery asked after a few minutes.

“Yeah?”

“Tell me something about yourself.”

“Like?”

“I don’t know… What’s your favorite color?”

“Silver, the color of your eyes.” I whispered. He was silent for a while. I cleared my throat. I was going to turn around but I thought I might squish the petite boy. “What’s yours?”

“Green. The color of yours.” He answered back. I swallowed. I felt my chest tighten. Was this flirting? I’ve dated girls before but girls are different than guys… It’s easier to tell.

Who am I kidding though? I’m not gay and even if I was I doubt Emery is.

He wouldn’t want me anyway…

“What’s your worst memory?” Emery said after awhile. I guess I had been quiet for a long time. I tapped my chin, staring at the darkness. I had never really thought of that.

“Um… worst memory… Probably, my dad leaving.” I said shrugging sadly.

“You must miss him a lot.” Emery whispered. I shrugged and turned around to face him. His eyes sparkled.

“Yeah, I do. I should have gotten over this by now. It’s been years since he left, since I last saw him. I shouldn’t even be talking about him.” I muttered, tracing circles on my pillow. I tried to hide my discontent but he saw through me. Emery nudged me gently.

“It’s okay if you want to talk about him. I’ll listen, I don’t mind. From the way it sounds, you’ve needed someone to talk to for a long time. You’ve been keeping quiet for too long, Beck. It had to have been hard, you were only a kid. There was probably some trauma. I think this is normal.” He said, trying to comfort me. I shook my head.

“Maybe for a twelve year old girl it is but not for a seventeen year old guy. It’s been nine years…” I whispered. He rubbed my shoulder, I melted into his touch.

“You haven’t talked about this before have you?” He asked quietly. I hesitated but nodded.

“People shouldn’t see me like this. I don’t need pity; I was supposed to be strong. For my mom, for me, for everyone. I was supposed to act like I could handle it. And I still am supposed to, but… we were close.” I said. He sighed and went in for a hug. I let him hold me, even though I didn’t make a move to hug him back.

“Beck, I’ll listen to you. You don’t have to be strong anymore.”

I couldn’t have felt even more girly right then. Here I was, telling Emery about my “daddy issues” and “abandonment issues” and I shouldn’t even remember it. It’s been nine years since I’ve seen my dad, Collin should be my dad now. After all, he’s the dad I should have had.

I couldn’t help but smile into his hair. I breathed him in.

 He smells like strawberries. I thought with a smile. I lightly pushed him away and pat his head. “What about you? What’s yours?”

He tapped his chin. “Easy. Levi leaving for college.” He said simply. “I had already lost Avery and I wasn’t about to lose Levi to. I didn’t want my older brothers leaving me behind… We barely saw Avery because of college, now Levi was leaving to? I didn’t think so. I cried for four hours straight.” He chuckled sadly. I couldn’t help but smile and his cute dorkyness.

“That’s really cute actually.” I said softly.

“I was fifteen. I’m sixteen and a half now.” He snorted. I laughed loudly. He stuck his tongue out at me and crossed his arms like a child. I reached over and ran my hand through his silky smooth hair.

“It’s okay. It’s still cute.”

Before I knew it, Emery had fallen asleep. He snored softly, his small chest moving up and down. I smirked and moved so that I was turned with my back towards him.

He really is something.

God damn, I must be tired.

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My babies!

They grow up so fast!

I wanted to give you guys sort of a background check on Beck, so there ya go! :) 

Hope ya liked it! :)

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