Ishq | (complete)

23 | maazi

ایک ہی اپنا ملنے والا تھا"
"ایسا بچھڑا کہ پھر ملا ہی نہیں
"Aik Hee Milne Wala Tha,
Aesa Bichra Ke Phir Mila Hee Nahi"

"my son"

For the first time in a decade, he brought the words on the tip of his tongue. The seconds stretched ruefully into minutes. I'm trying to save her from losing everything. He was trying to justify the sense that it was so easy to say the words to her, he couldn't even repeat to himself. It was terrifying for him to be so vulnerable with her.

my son

The enchanting view of Islamabad faded as he sketched his past for her through his quiet words. That how his parents worked day and night to send him to the engineering school. At the age of Eighteen when they were freshmen, he had seen Asmara Saeed walking through the corridor of the Physical Science building and he fell for her. It was the initiation party when he had asked her out and she had said yes. Dating was against all his morals and beliefs coming from a religious household, but there was something sweet in that rebellion for him. Only if he had known that sometimes poison can taste sweet.

They were Ninteen when their parents found out and forbidden them from seeing each other. Their parents had used the most absurd excuses: She was too rich. He was too religious. She was too Azad. He didn't belong to their class. Neglecting their love, their families had found the extremes within each other, leading them to take the drastic decisions too. Next thing he knew, they eloped from home settling in the outskirts of Islamabad, in the city of Harnoi on the wrong side of tracks.

They were in love. They were happy. They were back in school, using their savings, using their scholarships. They were too stupid and blinded by love to realize that they were too young to become parents and how deeply it was going to affect their relationship. Still, at the age of Twenty, they became two young parents with no jobs in prospect and disowned by their parents. And it was all merry until the loss of scholarship fell on them, her savings ran thin, and no job in sight. Fewer hours spent together, more in arguments, the cries of the baby got louder, and the house seemed to have been shrinking to the point that it seemed to be suffocating. They still tried to make it, for the sake of their baby until their world fell apart one day.

His baby, the piece of his heart, the piece of his soul, was sick. His little baby who could barely smile was in pain. His baby's tiny little heart had a hole in his heart and he had no money to save him. The reports had fallen from his hands as he carried that little bundle of joy in his hands. His legs shook so he took a seat on that cold and uncomfortable plastic chair in the hallway. His little Wajdan opened his eyes blinking at him, reaching out his tiny hands. Shehryar gave his finger in Wajdan's tiny hands and his little boy wrapped those fragile hand around his finger. And it was that moment when he swore to go to any extreme to save his baby.

Squashing his ego, he had gone to Saeed Regional and was thrown out as brutally as he had expected. He didn't know day from night, didn't know when one started when one ended. He left his studies, did odd jobs to save money only to come back to a locked door one day. Asmara had left, taking Wajdan. Collecting all the money he had earned and borrowed from his family, he went begging at her father's door to let him see Wajdan, but they never opened the door. Every day he offered every last thing he had, just to see a glimpse of his baby, but no one let him see his little boy. Not even when his Wajdan was in pain. Not even when he was admitted to the hospital. Not even when his baby succumbed to the pain. Not even when his little soul left this earth And that night he lost everything with the death of baby Wajdan.

Her tears continuously fell on her hands as she folded them in her lap. Heartbreaking. It was utterly heartbreaking to hear each and every word, so she couldn't even imagine how he survived the loss of his child. His entire world he so beautifully curated with love morphed into pain, loss, and betrayal by one person he loved the most in this world. She averted her gaze towards him, his eyes had turned as dark as the sinister clouds falling upon them. He rubbed the bridge of his nose, closing his eyes to hide away the blistering pain that still caged him.