YouTube ➸ Larry Stylinson

51 - Thoughts

And finally, after another few days of auditions and a collab with Tyler & Troye (which happened to include spicy foods and Tumblr, if you can imagine), the boys are all home from Los Angeles. 

Harry's been acting antsy, lately, Louis has noticed, annd every time he asks, Harry pushes it off like it's nothing. It's like he has something on his mind but he's too scared to say it.

"You know," Louis starts, as he sits on the couch with Harry next to him, who's biting his nails, "whatever it is, you can tell me."

Harry looks down at his hands, realizing he had been biting the nails subconciously. 

"What do you mean?" Harry asks, sucking in his bottom lip. 

"You know what I mean." Louis sighs; he's brought this sudden mood change of Harry's up multiple times during the last few days.

"I don't." Harry shrugs. 

Louis rolls his eyes, switching the channel on the telly to some murder mystery.

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The next time Louis asks is when he and Harry are out to dinner, and Harry swirls his spaghetti  on his fork rampantly, but doesn't eat it. 

"Harry, you can tell me what's wrong."

Harry then looks down at his plate, and takes a bite of the spaghetti. 

"What are you talking about?" he responds, clearing his throat.

Louis frowns and drops his eyes down at his food. Whatever Harry's hiding or being bothered about has to be bad if he won't tell Louis about it. Or, maybe he doesn't trust Louis anymore. The thought makes Louis want to cry.

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Louis asks Niall about it, next. Harry went to bed early, and Louis is more worried about him than he's ever been before. 

Dialing the number and waiting as it rings, Louis bites his lip in anxiety. Harry being so closed off is making Louis doubt himself.

"Hello?" Niall answers, and the sounds of a bar are in the background: loud, drunk people and a football game blaring. 

"Hey," Louis gulps before continuing. "Do you... know what's up with Harry?"

Niall hesitates, "Harry? What's wrong with him?"

"That's what I'm asking you." Louis sighs, desperate.

"He seems fine to me," Louis can practically hear the shrug that Niall probably does.

"Are you sure? He's not... hiding anything? Acting weird?" Louis bites on his thumbnail. It's driving him crazy.

"Not to me." Niall replies, "Sorry I can't help, mate."

"It's.. it's fine. Thanks, Ni." Louis hangs up, resisting the urge to let out a sob. 

Why is Harry acting so secluded? Does he not want Louis anymore? Thoughts torture Louis as he wonders what could possibly be the matter.

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Zayn and Liam are Louis' next source of help, then, and while Harry's not home (he's out with Niall) Louis invites them over. 

Zayn doesn't even bother to ring the doorbell before walking into Louis' house, noticing that the dishes haven't been done (which Harry always does!).

Louis sits in the living room, with Delilah in his lap. She's purring with joy, but Louis' face doesn't portray the same emotion. He feels like his world is off tilt, like he's spinning out of control.

"Louis?" Liam greets Louis in a worried manner, "What's the matter?"

Liam and Zayn sit opposite of Louis, on the love-seat, and look at him with concern. 

"Do you think Harry's been acting normal lately?" Louis manages to squeak out, and Delilah jumps out of his lap and runs over to the newcomers, hopping into Zayn's leg. Zayn shoos her off, and she heads towards the kitchen, then, to eat some food, presumably. 

"The dishes aren't done." Zayn notes, obviously something that's not normal. 

"Right." Louis frowns. "He's - Harry's not really talking to me... like, I mean, he talks to me... but there's something he won't tell me. Something is bothering him and he won't tell me what it is..," he puts his head in his hands, "What if he wants me to move out?"

"He wouldn't want that." Liam sounds sure. 

"How could you know? He's not being himself; I've asked him multiple times what the problem is and he won't budge!"

"Harry loves you." Zayn states the fact, "Give him some time, and ask again."

Louis nods, jumping as the front door opens. Harry's home.

"Hi, Harry!" Liam calls, to make it seem like the trio had not just been talking about him.

"Oh," Harry says when he sees the three of them in the living room. "hey, guys."

He goes straight to his and Louis' room, after that.

Louis cries out, "See?" 

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When Harry walks in on Louis sitting on the floor crying in the bathroom, later that week, Louis thinks that it wouldn't be surprising if Harry just walked straight back out. He feels bad, after thinking that, when Harry sits on the floor next to Louis and takes him into a hug, rocking him back and forth to soothe the wailing. 

"Baby, what's wrong?" Harry coos, and Louis wants to scream.

"Why?" is all Louis can manage, his voice cracking in the middle. 

"Why what?" Harry pushes Louis' hair out of his forehead. 

"You're acting so... like you don't want to -" Louis cuts off with a sob, and then covers his mouth. 

"I'm sorry..." Harry continues to cradle his boyfriend, "I didn't know I was bothering you."

"Harry," Louis pauses, taking a shaky breathe. "what's bothering you?"

"It's nothing."

"The fuck it's not." Louis wipes his eyes on his sweatshirt, pulling himself away from Harry and sitting so that he's facing Harry, on the floor. He takes Harry's hands in his own. "Tell me what's wrong."

"I just... I really want -" Harry stops, "I don't know if you want..," he bites his lip, "I can't say it!" he sounds angry with himself. 

"Harry, I love you. I love you so much. Whatever it is, I won't be mad." Louis locks eyes with Harry.

"I don't want you to leave..."

"I won't. I promise I won't."

"I want..." Harry takes a deep breath, "How do you feel about kids of our own?"

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THE END 

holyshitholyshit it's over (i mean besides the christmas special but still) 

so if you didn't really get why harry was closed off is because he was super insecure about having kids and such and he wasn't sure if louis wanted kids or how louis would react... so he tortured himself with scenerios of louis leaving and all that. we'll see what happens soon >:)