(Repeat Work By Charlotte day Wilson)
Julissa's Story -
In the beginning things are easy, we start off fairly well. Her parents spent most of the third year of their marriage trying to convence her. Her parents were told by dozens of doctors that having. A child would be close to impossible, her mom had multiple miscarriages. Finally they had Julissa. Her first language was spanish, her mother was Mexican and her father, Dominican. Julissa was their miracle.
They made sure to let her know it too, up until age eight she was constantly being put in pageants. It felt like her parents were putting her on display, but she didn't mind. In fact she loved it more than anything. Her mom was her best friend, constantly giving her advice. Assuring her that she could do anything she put her mind to, and to never give up.
Little did she know, her mom wasn't well. Not mentally, she ended up taking her life on Julissa's birthday. It definitely didn't help that Julissa was the one who found her. Julissa did everything but give up. She had to be strong, for her father. She always looked for the positive in things, never daring to look at the negative.
At age nine her and her dad decided to sell the house, living in that house felt like living with a ghost. She embraced the new move, meeting a friend in her new neighborhood. Cameron Dolan, from the moment they met they were inseparable. Her father got along well with Cameron's parents. Lisa felt like a second mom to Julissa, not replacing her mom of course, but giving her someone she could trust.
When Zhavia came into the picture Julissa felt like she had someone who understood. They understood each other. They helped each other over come. That was until Julissa's dad started dating. Then things got rocky. He'd start to pay less attention to her, get in arguments, say things he didn't mean. Although he didn't mean them and she knew that, it didn't hurt any less hearing them.
Her eighth grade year would be the craziest of her life. She was only fourteen of course, but mentally she was pretty advanced. She was pretty smart too good at just about everything she put her mind too.
Zhavia was her life line, she always understood, until she didn't anymore. Cameron couldn't really help, she could never understand. One night at a sleepover for all of them, Julissa went to the bathroom and finally just started crying. All the pressure of her and her dad growing apart, her feeling like she was loosing her connection to her two best friends... She had always looked at the positive, but not anymore. She couldn't do it.
Grayson herd her that night, he helped her. Over a course of a month they became really close. Like really close, he told her how he felt and they started dating from there. They'd sneak around with each other, he helped her. She started looking forward to the sleepovers again, waiting till everyone fell asleep so she could just talk to Grayson. He made her forget about what was going on at home or that she was starting to become depressed.
She thought he was her cure, not knowing he was more of a distraction. All that mattered was that she felt happy again... Cameron wasn't too happy when she found out. She didn't get it, and she definitely didn't help Julissa. It just made things really bad. She told Julissa that she'd never forgive her, and forbid her from seeing Grayson. Never inviting her over to another sleep over.
Zhavia tried to talk sense into Cameron, but her mind was made. That's when the change started to happen. With no more her, Zhavia, and Cam she was stuck with her own thoughts. Hating herself and everything around her, except Grayson. He tried his best to cheer her up, giving her gifts, staying up late on the phone, writing her letters. She found comfort in him.
She apologized to Cameron over and over until she realized there was no getting her back.
Things only continued to get worse for her, her dad got engaged. Next thing she knew his fiancé was living with them. He definitely stopped paying attention to her at this point, she would lash out at him and one night he took her phone, she was no longer allowed to leave the house not for anything other than school. No longer being able to see Grayson. She felt trapped. One night, she snuck into the alcohol cabinet and she decided to have a drink.
She felt nothing when she drank, so she started doing it on a regular basis. By the time her dad apologized and gave her, her privileges back she didn't want them anymore. What she wanted was to not feel. She hid it well from everyone, but not Grayson. He tried to help her, but there was only so much he could do. It's not like she wanted help.
She liked the new feeling, eventually moving on to opioids, weed, whatever she could get her hands on. She didn't miss her mom when she was high or drunk, she didn't miss anything.
One night she went too far, she'd taken some fentanyl and decided it'd be a good idea to mix it with hard liquor. She ultimately overdosed and her dad found her, he'd never felt so failed as a parent. First his wife, now his daughter. She was put in the hospital, had her stomach pumped and only one person besides her dad came to see her. Grayson. He wasn't supposed to, he used all his savings on a bus ticket to the hospital. It was about two hours away from where they lived.
He was so hurt, he blamed Cam for a while, then himself, for not being able to help her. He stopped eating for a week when he found out she'd been sent to a rehabilitation center in New York.
She knew she didn't deserve him, she felt like she deserved everything bad thing that came her way.
She was broken.
