Ghosts, Zombies and Maggots

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"What the hell is going on here?" I mumble as I run my ethereal hands over my ghastly body

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"What the hell is going on here?" I mumble as I run my ethereal hands over my ghastly body. "Am I dead?"

A loud gurgle catches my attention, and I stare in horror at the half-human/half-monster that is wandering in front of me.

"Oh, my freaking self! I am feeling so confused that I could eat three entire chicken pies and drain five beers right now." I pause in a vain attempt to rub my stomach. "Oh, damn it. I guess I am dead for sure." I mutter as my hand goes through my body. "What shall I do now? Where is the light at the end of the tunnel?"

The loud gurgle echoes inside my empty head, and I turn to face the half-human/half-monster that is walking towards a group of weird creatures just like it.

"What the hell happened here?" I look around me in confusion, taking in the destroyed buildings, abandoned cars and gloomy environment that I used to call home until not long ago.

"Look at me, searching for food and trying to scare the other zombies." A male voice startles me.

"Who the hell are you?" I gasp in surprise when I see a pretty good-looking ethereal man floating next to me.

"I am him." He points to a grey half-human/half-monster creature that is eating newspaper from the garbage can. "Since when do zombies eat newspapers? That's what happens when every single human being has been transformed into a zombie, and there's no more brain to be consumed as a delicacy." He snorts while shaking his head in disbelief. "I am eating the newspaper! Is it The New York Times?"

"What are you talking about? Are you telling me that you are that awful creature there?" I point to the scary - scratch that - dumb creature that is chewing a soggy piece of newspaper and grimacing in disgust.

"Yes, I am that zombie's ghost. That's me, not deceased." The man pauses, scratching his head. "Well, I am deceased in a certain way but..."

"Hold on." I cut him short. "Are you telling me that you are that monster?" I widen my empty eyes in shock, and I can tell that my face is pale, even though I don't carry any shade of colour in my skin anymore.

"I am not a monster, I am a zombie. I mean, not me, well, it is me, but not me, you get it?" He tilts his head to the side while shoving his hands inside the pockets of his jeans, which goes right through the air.

"Zombie? Those creatures are zombies?" I am feeling absolutely flabbergasted. "How did that happen? Where are the survivors?"

"I don't remember much, but I do remember being attacked by a zombie, and then I blacked out. Next thing I know, I am waking up next to my zombie-version and discovering that there is life after death." The man laughs. "I guess my Mom has been accurate all along."

"Where are the survivors? Maybe I am still alive and waiting to be rescued from the likes of you!" I jump in excitement at the thought of me being alive.

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