Secrets I need to tell you- Prologue

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This is a new story that I am starting. It popped in my head and i really wanted to share it with you guys so please read and enjoy.

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"I hate it when you make fun of me. It hurts me when you pick on what kinds of foods I don't like. Yes I understand that I don't like a lot of things but that doesn't mean I don't like food. I do like food just not some things, so please stop making fun of my tastes. Another thing I don't like, when you make fun of how big my boobs are. Yes they are really huge, but I can't help that. I didn't ask for them. I am utterly embarrassed by how big they are. I don't like that you patronize half the stuff I wear when you pick out the clothing. Again it's not my fault that they stick out and are like looky here I'm huge please stare at me. You don't seem to understand that I am very unconfident about my body so stop with the comments about my breast. Since I am venting out I might as well tell you that I am not a virgin anymore and don't go all spastic on me because I have a really good reason as to why I am no longer a virgin. I decided a while ago that if someone like your ex-husband can steal something that is supposed to be special well then i want to get rid of it of my own free will. So I did it with a guy that you thought was a bad person to be hanging out with. For your information I had to beg him to have sex with me and I had to tell him about almost being raped and I didn't want someone I didn't care about to take my virginity away. I didn't love him but I did care about him, so my first time was very special. I'm sorry you are finding out this way. I really hope you're not mad t me about my choice but again it was mine and it definitely not a mistake. Finally the last thing I want to address is that I hate that you are so protective of me. I just want to have a couple of guys over without you freaking out and every guy I talk to does not mean they are my boyfriend so stop asking. I do have guy friends and I would like to hang out with them. I love you very much but you need to let me go. I know you do trust me it's just everyone else you don't trust but I know how to kick guys in the nuts and punch them in the nose so I can take care of myself. Also if I go to a party I would like to tell you so if something happens I can call you up but I can never tell you because you would refuse to let me go. But come on if I don't learn how to control myself now when I'm in high school then when I get to college I will end up making a lot of mistakes and it's a lot worse because you won't be there to help me through it. And I would love to have you know everything that is going on with my life and I mean everything all the ups and downs and bad choices I make."

I look back over the letter I just wrote but decided to rip it up because my hand writing got sloppy at the end and also I was too afraid to actually give her the note. I've been sitting in my room crying over the littlest thing for a while now. I was crying over being made fun of, how I don't like food. Yes it's pretty lame to cry over but it hurts my feelings. I wish I could express my feelings but it is really hard for me. I have tried telling these things to her for a while now and every time I start talking to her about all those things I just wrote about I choke and can't tell her. I also get sweaty and nervous.

Instead of telling her to her face I decided to write her but my handwriting sucks. I wish I wasn't such a pansy. When it comes to talking around my friends I can say anything but when it comes to her I can't say anything. When can I just stand up to her and tell her all these things.

"Ashley can you come help me with dinner." Ugh I hate her right now.

I quickly got out of my closet and walked to the kitchen, to go help her.

"What are we making?" I asked her in very depressed way.

"We are having enchiladas. Aren't you excited?" Yea I am so excited I thought ugh I hate when she is all nice after a fight we just had.

"hmmm" I mumbled just to give her an answer.

"If you are going to act like that then you can leave." God, how can she not understand why I am acting like this?

"Fine I'm going." I shouted at her.

I stomped my way back to my room. If I wasn't a pansy and any other teenager I would have stomped out the house but of course I'm neither. I grabbed my pillow and went back into my closet where I like to go because it makes me feel safe for some reason.

I heard something vibrate from outside the closet. I got up with an irritated sigh because I just got comfortable. I looked on my bed to see a light from underneath the blanket. I grabbed my phone realizing that it was the thing that was vibrating. I looked on the screen to see that it was my best friend, Bryce.

-Hey are you okay you hung up on me.

-Yea I'm sorry about that but I was getting into a fight with my mom

-Oh are you okay

-No she doesn't understand me.

-Do you need me to be over tonight?

-Yes please come and plus you know you were going to come even if I was fine

-Yep I know but now you really need me

-Yes I do well see you tonight

-Okay see you

I put my phone down beside me thinking that I wish tonight could come faster and my mom go to sleep sooner because I really wanted to talk to him and also I can't sleep without him because I get really bad nightmares.

But I did fall asleep in my closet and the last thing I thought was I wish I could have told all those things I said in that letter or at least given it to my mom. Maybe she would understand me more.


Please tell me what you think

I would love any comment especially since this is new and i would like to know if i should continue

also it might just be a short story unless i think of more and you really like it. 

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