The Only Girl In The World

Chapter Twenty-four

~Kaylee

Dropping my pen, I closed my journal as I got up from my chair making my way to my bed before collapsing on it.

After spending at least one hour scribbling in my journal, I decided maybe I was over reacting. The memory of yesterday flooding my mind and I grabbed my pillow to my face as I groaned into it.

I felt so embarrassed running off like that. I mean it was….a lot and very unexpected but there was so much emotions and thoughts going through my mind. I didn’t even end up telling him the truth.

Dropping the pillow, I let out a sigh. Taking my phone, I ignored the numerous texts and missed calls from Christian and dialed another number.

“Hello.” Becca’s voice came through from the speaker after a few seconds of ringing. “Kaylee? Are you ok?”

“Yeah…I guess.” I said not even sure of my answer. “I just….I’m not bothering you, am I?”

“OK, I’m coming over. Text me your address.” she replied.

“No, you don’t have to. I just-”

“Address or I’ll track you down. I’ll be there in a jiffy.” she cut me off and ended the call.

I rolled my eyes as I sent her my address, a small smile playing on my lips. As she promised, she was here in less than ten minutes.

“You really didn’t have to come.” I said as I opened the door for her.

“It’s a Saturday, I have nothing better to do. And this is the first time you’ve called me to talk since we made up, it’s mostly just texts or seeing each other at school. If this is my one chance to prove my friendship to you, then I wouldn’t miss it for the world.”

“You don’t have to prove anything, I already know that.” I laughed hugging her.

She wrapped her arms around me hugging me back. “Just making sure. Besides, I’m like your only friend.”

“You wish.” I said pulling out of the hug. “I have other friends…”

“You mean Christian’s friends?”

“They’re still technically my friends and I feel like we’ve all been really connecting” I said, silently subtracting Ryan in my head.

Ryan was still as mysterious and quiet as ever. To me anyway, he didn’t talk much but at least he was friendly to the others.

She did have a point though, I couldn’t exactly talk to them about what was going on especially with the fact that they were Christian’s friends first and I would just make everything awkward.

“OK, whatever you say.” she said in a mocking tone and I decided to ignore her and let her have the last say as we went upstairs.

“So what’s up?” she asked as we got to my room.

“It’s…about Christian.” I said nervously as I shut my room door.

“OK, you’re going to tell me everything from the beginning. I’m going to find some snacks for us so we can catch up.” she said leaving the room casually exploring my house like it was hers.

She eventually found the kitchen, got us two big bowls of chocolate ice cream and chocolate chip cookies and came back to the room.

“You know exactly what I want.” I said as she dropped them on the floor next to me.

“Remember our sleepovers when we were younger. This was all we would eat when we were talking about boys, how could I not know?” she joked settling on the floor next to me.

Taking the bowl of ice cream and spoon, I scooped some into my mouth moaning into the creamy delicious taste.

“It’s kind of a long story.” I started.

A few minutes later, empty bowls and cookie wrappers, I was done.

“So what you’re trying to say is, you fell hard for him and you’re scared to lose him because of your cancer but yet you don’t even want to tell him?” she summarized making it look dumber than I knew it already was.

“No it’s just not that.” I said laughing. “I always knew at one point I would you know, die. The doctor confirming it was just…like the last straw. And if I’m going to die, I don’t want him to waste his time on me. I know how badly I was hurt when my parents died. Then again, I don’t want to tell him because I don’t want lose him.”

“So if you knew, why did you ever get close to give in the first place.” she asked raising her eyebrows. “I read the most ridiculous and delusional Wattpad stories but yours is a whole new level.”

I glared at her playfully knowing she was just messing with me.

 “I didn’t plan for any of this to happen. I did try to push him away but I eventually opened up to him. And it just kept going and I kept on going with it. And then when he dropped that bomb shell on me yesterday, it felt like I was dragged back to the harsh reality.”

“I feel you. I really do think he should know though. Especially since you two have been dating, he does have the right to know. He should be the one to make that choice and he better make the right one or he’s going to have a problem with me.”

I smiled weakly.

“He shouldn’t have to make that choice though. He never should have gotten involved with me in the first place. I can’t hurt him because….I…I um…” I hesitated a bit feeling my cheeks heat up. “I love him too.”

“Kaylee” Becca said dropping her plate and turning so she was directly opposite me. “I’m your friend. I love you and you know that. And it kills me knowing that I have limited time with you. That doesn’t make me want to leave you. I want to spend every single time you have left to make memories, I want to make up for every time that we lost those years and I want to be there for you. That’s my choice. You don’t have to worry about me getting hurt. Let me deal with that. If he can’t love you like that, then he doesn’t deserve you.”

“I’m glad I have someone like you.” I said pulling her for another hug but this time tighter and with more warmth. “I love you too.”

“So you really are going to…” She trailed off as she pulled out of the hug, her expression a lot more serious and concerned.

“Yeah, but it’s ok. I have a lot of time left and I’m not going to sit down and sulk.” I said meaning it with all my heart.

I was done sulking, being all depressed and numb. If I had a little time left in this world, then I should make the most of it. Even if it’s a bit selfish, but everyone has the right to be selfish sometimes. Right?

“Should I text him? Or call?” I asked changing the topic back to Christian.

“This is something you guys should talk about on a one on one.” Becca said and I nodded. “You coming to school this week?”

“I might have to stay another week or so, doctor’s orders.” I rolled my eyes.

“Then come to his basketball game on Friday. It’s the school’s last game for the term.” She suggested. “He’ll definitely be shocked to see you.”

“So what you’re saying is I should continue ignoring his texts or calls, make up excuses then surprise him at his game. Talk to him, probably make out and live happily ever after?” I asked and she nodded beaming happily.

“You need to stop your obsession for Wattpad books, you’re really delusional now.” I laughed.

“Being delulu is the solulu.” she stated making me burst into a fit of laughter.

More ice cream, cookies and Netflix, the day went in a lash. She really made my day and I realized how lucky I was to have someone like her.
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