I REMEMBER YOUR smile. I remember you pulling me in tight – your bones against mine. I cherished the way your cheeks flushed red and dimples shined whenever you laughed. I recall the feeling of my ribs hurting when our stupidity got the best of us and we couldn't stop laughing. I remember us, what we had, the adrenaline only you could evoke. Do you?
Do you still think of me as your best? You probably don't. No, I know you don't, because if you did, you wouldn't have looked at me like that. You wouldn't have hung your head at the sight of me and avoided me at school.
"Jack, I'm sorry. I know how much you love me, and I'm so sorry I led you on for so long. I lost feelings a while ago but I didn't want to hurt you. You were so happy. So, I think it's best if I cut this off before I eventually hurt you too bad."
You wouldn't have said that if you cared. You wouldn't have left me like this: missing your wavy, ebony hair and olive skin. You wouldn't have left me trying to replicate the feeling of your skin under my hands. So as I drink away my thoughts in the midst of this house that smells like alcohol with a tinge of sex, I wonder, is this what you wanted?
—
I'm back, better than ever
YOU ARE READING
ultimately. j avery.
Fanfiction"ultimately i don't understand a thing." in which jack lives life like he's in a coming of age movie.
