Renegades and Stubborn Pride

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"You're in my heart. You're in my mind. Everywhere ahead, everywhere behind. Every turn I take, you're right around the bend. It's like your ghost is chasin me when i'm awake, when I'm asleep. There's a part of you in every part of me. And I can't outrun you... I thought there might just come a time, when I wouldn't regret tellin' you goodbye. Lookin' back I shoulda realized, I can't outrun you." Trace Adkins 'Can't Outrun You'

Jonah stared out the window of his hotel room and out across the dusty town. How long had he been here now? A month? Two? Three? Hell he couldn’t remember. Time didn’t seem to matter anymore.

Nothing had mattered in five long years. Jonah had thought he’d finally figured things out. He had thought he’d learned what his life was supposed to be and so he had followed that path… and in doing so he had lost everything that he had ever loved. His dignity. His self respect. His friends. His Joe….

An image of that red haired, more stallion than mare filly flashed through his mind and Jonah nearly cried out in anger at the pain it inflicted.

An irritated moan came to his ears and he remembered the well paid and very talented whore that was currently on her knees in front of him, her full lips and hot mouth teasing and pleasuring his cock in ways that only years of practice could teach a woman to do.

Jonah put his hand on her blond hair and tried to focus on the pleasure she was bringing him and it worked for a moment as he threw his head back.

Then his traitorous mind broke in again. Where was Joe? Was she okay these days? Jonah had gone to her cabin a few times over the last five years in hopes that she’d be there but it was clear the place had been abandoned. He knew he shouldn’t have tried to see her, after all the woman had told him not to… He figured after being the idiot he had been, Joe deserved much better than him and he wondered with a jealous jolt whether or not she had found it.

“Maybe I should just go.” sighed the whore between his legs, he was sure he knew her name it simply wasn’t coming to him at the moment. Jonah looked down at his cock and realized it had begun to deflate.

With embarrassment he nodded and quickly plopped his hat over his naked lap.

“Sorry about that.” he said quietly. She nodded as she stood up and adjusted her petticoat and corset.

“It happens sometimes.” she replied with a shrug. “Whoever she is, you should probably get back to her. Clearly you’re not over it.”

“Thanks for the advice.” Jonah muttered as he grabbed the whiskey bottle off the bedside table and downed a long swig of it. How pathetic did a man have to be when the whores were offering him advice on his love life? Apparently pretty damn pathetic.

Jonah heard her clear her throat and he turned his gaze up to her painted face and saw that she was holding out her hand and eyeing him expectantly.

“What the hell for?” he demanded, knowing she wanted coin.

“For wasting my time up here. It’s not my fault your equipment ain’t working today.”

Jonah grumbled under his breath and stood quickly. He pulled his pants up and buttoned them before digging around in his pocket for coins.

“Take it!” he snapped as he all but threw the two tiny pieces of metal into her hand. “And get the hell out!”

Jonah found himself alone again and went to the washbasin to splash his face with the day old water.

Jonah’s life had completely fallen apart. He had tried to live as a gambling outlaw who looked out for himself and had no friends but it had been like trying to wear a boot that was a single size too small.

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