Unreadable. Unreachable. Unrequited. | TsukiYama ✓

7

[Yamaguchi]

We hadn't seen any more Nekoma kids on the streets over the rest of the week and Tsukishima had disappeared after practise the whole time. Hinata told us once they'd left so that operation 'get Stingyshima back' (lovingly named by Hinata) could be set in motion. Was I nervous? Extremely. Tsukishima really was an enigma, I didn't know if he'd even care... but I had to try. It's really all I had.

So, as Tsukishima walked out of practise ahead of us, I didn't make an effort to join him or call out his name. Usually I walked right beside him while Hinata and Kageyama were in a pair next to me, but this time around it was Hinata nearest him. I was on the other side of Kageyama, telling a story like usual.

"I met this cat the other day. He kept following me everywhere until I pet him." I chuckled nervously. "I tried pulling my hand away and he scratched me! Look at the mark he left." I turned my hand over and let the two stare at my scratched hand, they both made quiet 'oooooh' noises as they inspected it. It was a weak story compared to what I normally told, but considering how Tsukishima kept glancing at us I knew it was working. He wanted to know why I was actually telling the story to Hinata and Kageyama while he was left being the one to listen in.
"So- Hinata, Kageyama, you been working on any new crazy moves lately?"

Hinata shrugged, though nodded, looking fired up.
"We've been working on the freak quick where I keep my eyes open. It's gonna work one day, I'm telling you!"

"I believe you." I laughed, noting how Kageyama brightened up at the mention of their freak quick. It was no big grin, but after years of having to try and understand Tsukishima's awkward signals I'd become quite good at reading people. Honestly, I did completely believe it, those two were monsters on the court.

"Yeah yeah! When it's perfect Kageyama will be all pow-!" He mimicked Kageyama's perfect setting as we walked, "-and I'll be all wapoosh!" He then hurried forward and jumped up, giving an example of his insanely quick jump and spike. I laughed, clapping.

"Awesome! I can't wait to see-"

"Shortie, are you ever actually going to use words when you talk? Sound effects aren't going to win against Shiratorizawa you know." Tsukishima spoke suddenly, raising a brow at us. It took us all by surprise, considering Tsukishima rarely made quips like that on the way home anymore.

"...Hinata. Meat buns." Kageyama grabbed the back of Hinata's shirt and started dragging him into a cafe almost immediately. Hinata whined, waving goodbye to me though not seeming to protest or pull away. Now it was just me and Tsukishima.

"You've been hanging around those idiots more, haven't you? Yachi-san too." Tsukishima asked, dropping his headphones around his neck as he stared at me out of the corner of his eye.

"Well.. yeah. They're a lot of fun. They'll probably end up getting hurt if they don't have a babysitter with them anyway." I chuckled, rubbing my neck. There was a moment of pause. "You've been hanging out with Kuroo-san a lot lately too."

"I stayed in contact with him, Bokuto-san and Akaashi-san after the training camp. They're annoying." Tsukishima gave the smallest of shrugs. We then fell into an awkward silence, which quite literally broke my heart all over again. We were never awkward like this. Not even when we were kids.

"Tsukki, I was exploring not too long ago and found a new cafe had opened. I don't know if you've been but apparently their strawberry shortcake is the best..?" I offered.

There was another short pause.

"Not today."

"Sorry Tsukki."

"Don't apologise."

I just gave a little nod to that, glancing at him every so often. Finally, when we reached the point where we split off to go our separate ways, I stopped him.

"Tsukki.. we're friends right?" I asked hesitantly, making him raise a brow again. He did that when he was confused or suspicious.

"Yeah. What would make you think otherwise?" He asked, turning to face me fully.

Okay... Now or never. I had to tell him. I had to let him know what I'd been thinking. I was going to do it. I opened my eyes, finding a certain pebble on the ground. My safe spot. After a deep breath, I shakily began.

"I don't know, it's stupid.." what a way to start Confidentguchi, "but lately I guess I think we've been kinda distant? I don't know. You haven't talked to me much, not even to tell me to be quiet and.. I'm being selfish really. Selfish thoughts. I just want you to... pay more attention to me." I spoke that last part a little quieter, embarrassment filling up every part of me. "We're friends... friends talk, friends aren't.. supposed to ignore eachother and make the other feel stressed out. It's supposed to be a give-and-take thing right? I feel like..."

Finally, I looked up and met his eyes. He looked conflicted, while I was trying to look determined. I was just as cool as Tsukishima. He was lame next to me.

"I feel like I'm the only one giving."

There was another moment of silence before Tsukishima merely gave me a short nod. His expression dropped back to a dull poker face and he turned, walking off with his headphones back on. I stared after him, confused and hurting and...
Damn it.

"Yamaguchi?" I heard Hinata's quiet voice behind me. I turned to see him holding out a meat bun, a soft smile on his face. "Kageyama paid."

The three of us walked to a wall and sat down on it, munching away at the meat buns quietly.

"You're not crying?" Kageyama asked bluntly, earning a whack from Hinata because he was 'being insensitive'. I chuckled faintly and shook my head.

"I feel like I want to but at the same time I feel... calm? I don't know how to describe it. Just calm I guess."

"Like a weight's been lifted?" Hinata offered, finishing his food and pulling another out of a little baggy they'd bought.

"Mmh." I nodded, then went back to munching my food. "Thank you. You're both a lot of help, really. I don't know what I'd do without you."

"Aww look at you, getting all sappy! Hey, just remember this moment in third year when you're captain and make me vice captain." Hinata winked, nudging me with his elbow.

"Huh? No dumbass, he'll make me vice captain!"

"Oh you wanna pick a fight huh? I'll be vice!"

Then the two were back to squabbling about who I'd make vice captain. I snickered, which then turned to a bright laugh. It felt good to laugh after such a terrible moment.

"What makes you think I'll be captain? I wouldn't be very good at it." I asked, smiling at them and shaking my head. Hinata seemed to have been preparing for this question, as he cleared his throat and turned to grab my shoulders. I didn't miss Kageyama's little jealous sideglance though.

"You're the most friendly and supportive first year player, one of the other contestants is Stingyshima, another contestant is Bakayama, I don't wanna be full captain, you're smart, you're funny-"

"You give off crow vibes."

"-you give off crow vi- what?" Hinata looked to Kageyama while he nonchalantly ate his third meat bun, which I'd noticed he'd actually just taken out of Hinata's hands when the ginger wasn't looking. "Kageyama, what's a crow vibe?"

"Tanaka-san mentioned it once. I don't know."

"Ah that explains- Kageyama! You're eating my food!"

"I bought it."

"Kageyama!"

Those two really should just get a room.