The Essence Of Love

Next Lifetime

I make it out the gate and finally slow down. I kick my 6 inch Gucci heels off and keep walking down the street waiting for Elle. This shit is wild , this nigga really thought he was slick. My phone buzzes as she calls me.

"Sorry boo, I'm coming, I just slipped out."

"Ok I'm outside the gate, what's it looking like?"

"Not good, Titan told everybody to get the fuck out and started tearing shit up."

"Like on a scale of 1-10 how mad is he?"

"50."

"Good."

"Well, we have two hours to get to the airport, you wanna—"

"Where the fuck is she Ellarie?" Titans booming voice suddenly interrupts.

"Nigga give me my phone, fuck you! Call Uber boo this nigga—"

The line goes dead and I just stare at my phone in shock, damn,  this is not how my plan was supposed to go.

I look back towards the mansion as guests start loading into their cars. My phone lights up as Elle calls back.

"Jhené please don't do this shit to me, I swear to God don't do this." Titan's low tone comes through.

"Where is Elle Titan, did you hurt her?"

"What? I ain't do nothing to her ,just come back so we can talk, I ain't even mad at you baby, I know I fucked up—"

"Give her her phone NOW Titan, I don't want to talk to you!"

"Nigga , you need to get your shit together!" Elle says as she comes back on the line.

"Elle are you ok?"

"Yes girl this nigga ain't that stupid. I'm coming."

"Ok , I'm by your car." I say as a wave of nausea comes over me and I throw up all the alcohol from that night.

"Shit , are you ok boo?" She startles me as she comes up behind me.

"Yea just feeling sick all of a sudden."

"I have water in the car." She says as she unlocks the doors.

"Damn, I never looked at that test."

"What te—ohh no, Ess." She looks at me with sad eyes.

"I need to go back to the house and grab it, I peed on it already but was in such a rush I didn't check the results."

"Are you sure you wanna go back, what if he goes crazy?" She says right as Titan's matte black Lamborghini comes flying past us.

"I'll be quick, he can't hold me hostage, plus I'm not gonna tell him I'm leaving town , I'm just gonna say I'm going to my dads."

"Ok,but are you sure, you know he's crazy."

"I can be crazy too , fuck him, he doesn't run this!"

30 minutes later we pull up to the estate. Unfortunately he's already here but it's whatever. I'm taking my power back.

"Call me if he starts going crazy." Elle says as I get out.

"Ok."

I walk up the driveway and Titan opens the door holding a blunt before I can pull my key out. I walk inside and he doesn't say anything. The smell of loud is kind of nauseating.

"I'm going to go stay at my dads, I just need to grab something."

He nods as I walk around him towards his room. I swear it's the longest walk ever as my heels click against the marble and echo throughout the hallway, I look back to see if he's following me but he's just staring at me smoking his blunt. I walk inside and quickly go to the bathroom to grab the test off the counter but it's gone.

"You looking for something?" He startles me in a raspy tone and I jump. He holds the test up in his hand.

"It's negative, I know you about to leave me and shit, but I'm still gon' love you regardless. I know I did this shit to myself so I can't even be mad."

He walks up to me and strokes my cheek, staring into the depths of me. His eyes are no longer full of light ,but they look black, the black they transform into when he's King and not Titan.

"May—maybe next lifetime this can work." I say softly as my voice cracks.

"You right, next lifetime I'll get it right baby and we'll make it to the altar."

He kisses me on my nose and then my lips. I try to pull away but the way his strong hands feel around my waist slowly make me melt into his arms. He lifts me up and surprisingly just holds me instead of moving towards his bed as usual.

"Titan." I whisper.

"Yes baby?"

"I—I have to go."

"I know, I just wanted to hold you one last time." He says as I unwrap my legs from his waist and stand to my feet adjusting my dress. We stare at each other for a second until I break eye contact and walk out the room. When I get to the front door I turn towards him and the look in his eyes really gets to me. I suddenly think of TyTy, damn, I'm gonna miss my baby.

"I'll tell TyTy you'll come visit her soon." He says, reading my mind like he always does.

"Yea ok, do that please."

"I love you Essence."

"Right." I whisper as a tear falls to my cheek and he walks up to me and wipes it away.

"I do baby, I'm just a nigga with nigga like tendencies , I'm sorry I hurt you."

"Bye Titan." I turn to leave and he grabs my hand.

"Wait I—I'm sorry—can I just look at you for one more minute, this shit is tearing my ass up baby. You know how I feel about you, its gon' take me a minute to move past this shit."

"Titan I—"

" I swear, I just need to look at you for a minute, that's all, we ain't gotta talk or nothin', I just need a second to process this shit. I feel like a piece of me is dying." He says as I stare up at his handsome face. Damn he's really in love with me.

I get a text from Elle and I reassure her everything is ok.

"I have to go I—I'm sorry."

"Please ba—"

"I can't do this!"

I quickly open the door and dart down the driveway, when I look back he's just staring at me from the doorway and then he slams the door closed.

"You made it out alive." Elle teases as I slide into the passengers seat.

"Girl that was too intense, I've never felt like that before, so mad but so in love."

"Yea that's that twin flame love boo ,but you gotta love yourself more."

"I know."

"But it's ok , we're gonna take a little break from life and have fun in New York, fuck ATL."

"Yes! Fuck ATL lets go!"