Prince with Benefits

Chapter Ten

Mom continued to talk now looking absentmindedly, as if she was pretty much reliving the whole thing, "I was distraught, Emily...I had to leave immediately, and I felt used and broken and betrayed and so sad..."

My stomach clenched at her words, because that's exactly the same way that I feel...

"So I came here. To this same house. And if it wasn't for Anya, I don't think that I could have gone through it. She helped me in everything. I was really depressed, I didn't want to wake up, I didn't want to eat and I had no idea what day it was" Her emerald teary eyes glanced at me, "I-I forgot your birthday, Emily...and that day it hit me...I had left you, my sweet caring daughter. I was drowned in my own misery and I forgot about the most important thing that your father gave me...you, Emily..."

Her teary eyes let me know how sad and guilty she felt. Her hand searched for my own, "I'm so sorry, Emily, you have no idea how I've felt for you. There's not one day that I regret my actions. I should have told you. We could have figured it out together..." Her voice cracked in pretty much all her words. She was trying to contain her sobs, but even I could see that she was at the point of no return.

I, on the other hand, was speechless. My eyes brimmed with tears too, and I felt like I was about to explode. So many feelings and thoughts were passing through me...

"I need some air" I said somewhat composed, even though inside I was turmoil. I got up and glanced at my mother who looked at me completely distraught.

I stood on my knees in front of her, "don't feel guilty Mom...I never gave you a chance to explain yourself. I assumed too much and I wasn't here for you...I'm sorry" some tears leaked and fall on my cheeks, "but...I need some air, I need to think about everything, I'm not mad at you...I'm ashamed of myself..." and shocked, hurt and about to explode...I really need to get out of here, but I didn't want to leave her more stressed about me.

Her green eyes assessed me just like the way a mother can, I think she sensed there was more to it, but she suppressed any words on that matter. She smiled sadly at me and only mumbled, "Take your phone, Emily"

I nodded. I couldn't form any more words because I felt about to explode.

I did as told and grabbed the phone that laid on one of the sofas. Before I left out the door, I turned to look at my mother...I wanted to tell her everything but I also felt like maybe this could be too much for her...Crap...I didn't know what to do or to say, so I just waved at her and walked out the door.

As soon as the door closed, a sob escaped. I placed one palm over my mouth and I ran.

I ran as hard as I could until I couldn't breathe anymore. The now familiar dirty road ended and I had to choose where to go. Even though I was completely distraught, I decided to cross the street carefully and walk for a few minutes on the woods. Not much, I didn't think I could manage more stress if I'd get lost or something. I stopped and I leaned on the nearest tree on my right as I panted really hard and tried to breathe but I was pretty much hyperventilating.

I tried to calm myself by breathing in and out but my thoughts were all over the place. When I finally breathed as normally as one can breathe on these situations, I crumbled.

I sobbed and cried as hard as I could. I was angry and disappointed at my father. I felt betrayed by Anna, more from Sonya. Somehow, I was now sobbing against my knees sitting on the dirt, leaning on the tree.

How could my father do that?!

Did he feel guilty when he heard about what happened to me?

He should be!

He did the same to my mother!

And...Anna...what the hell is wrong with that family?!

I have no idea how much time I cried.