it can only get better... right?

"Okay, it's my turn." I told her politely. "What do you mean?" She stared into my eyes and seemed to look past them, almost as if she could see past the very walls I hid behind. She has beautiful Gray eyes, like none I've ever seen before. How come I've never noticed?

"It's my turn to as the questions Andrea" She motioned for me to go ahead, so I did. "Why do you sit here with me every day? It's obvious your friends don't approve." She looked bemused but answered anyway. "I honestly don't know jaye. I guess I just wanted to get to know the real you." Why would anyone want to get to know me? "The real me disappeared a long time ago." I told her, then to myself. I don't even know who I am anymore.

She tried to get me to explain but I just got frustrated and left. I felt bad for just leaving her there alone, but was sure that I'd forget about everything by the end of the day. But here I am, on a crowded bus in Seattle Washington, and I can't get her out of my head. It's not about leaving her hanging today because I got over that, as I'm sure she did as well. I just can't stop thinking about her.

I got off the bus in front of our apartment and checked the mail before going inside. My mother and I exchanged a quick "Hi" before she retreated to her bedroom with her boyfriend of the week. We both knew he wouldn't last much longer than that. It was bad enough that she slept around but did she really have to do it here? Doesn't he have a house they could go to?

I went to my little sister's room and peeked in. She's only 12, and only my half sister, but I don't mess around with technicalities. "Hey Lacey, how was school?" Lacey ran over to hug her big brother and smiled. "School was good, but mom forgot to come get me again. I had to have Mr. Paul drive me home." I sighed. Typical mom, she was never where she was supposed to be, and if she is you can guarantee she was at least an hour late. "I'm sorry Lace." I kissed my little sister on the forehead then went to my room and shoved a CD into my laptop. I turned on the music then checked my email before signing in to mychat. "I wonder who this is." I clicked on the friend request from Jesus_Freak and typed a quick message.

Jaye-S: Who is this?

I waited five minutes before I got a reply.

Jesus_Freak: It's me... Andrea.

Jaye-S: oh, did you need something?

Jesus_Freak: I just wanted to invite you to youth group tonight... I thought maybe we could go to DQ with a friend of mine after.

Jay-S: If I say yes will you stop sitting with me?

Jesus_Freak: Very funny. I'll pick you up around five.

I gave her directions to my apartment then logged off.

Did I seriously just agree to go to that? I've always found it difficult to understand how a girl could get you to do anything she asked you to do, but it's more than possible. I looked through my closet and rummaged through my drawers, trying to find something decent to wear. I settled on jeans and a button down shirt; classic black of course. I made sure my "Justin Bieber" hair (that's what my sister calls it) was flipping the right way then sat on the couch to wait.

There was a knock on the door at Five thirty and she apologized for the slip-up. "It's alright." I insisted.

We walked to her car and I opened the door for here. "This isn't a date; you don't have to do that." I shrugged it off and got into the car. It may not be a date but that doesn't mean I have to lose all manners.

As we were pulling out of the driveway I asked her if her only motive for inviting me was so that I could be a burnt offering; jokingly of course, I even laughed and everything. But she didn't answer me, she just shook her head. We drove for about thirty minutes then showed up at a little white church that looked friendly enough from the outside. But it's not the building that reflects the church, even I knew that. "Is it too late to drive me home?" I teased. But inside I was serious. "You'll be fine." She explained. "You're doing this for me remember?" Am I doing this for her? I can't decide; but I do know that whatever the reason, it had to be important.

She walked beside me until we got inside, then I watched as she greeted some of her friends. "Mark, this is Jaye." She introduced us, and then we both took a seat next to him. Mark shook my hand, it was so tight. (Is it just me, or does he seem tense?) Anyways... I listened to Andrea and Mark chat about School. They made sure to include me every once in awhile, but I was perfectly fine just listening. I spaced out after Marks lame attempt at flirting, and was jolted back to reality by the youth pastors greeting.

He opened by asking us all to turn to some passage that i don't remember. Of course i didn't have one of those books, so Andrea shared with me. Mark didnt seem pleased by that idea, which made me really happy for some odd reason. I scooted closer, as if i couldnt make out a word and she smiled and pointed to where we were. The end of the paragraph said "Do not arouse or awaken love until it so desires." Whatever that means...oh wait, looks like he's going to explain it, oh joy.

He sounds like a health teacher with a really wacked out message. It took everything in me to keep from laughing. How can sex be both good and bad? Just pick one and stick with it. i touched Andrea's knee to get her attention, but attracted Marks instead. He stood up, then realizing we were in the middle of the second row, turned bright red and sat back down, putting his face in his hands.

"Did you need something?" she whispered. I pretended to look shocked by Marks behavior then mouthed. "Bathroom?" I shifted my gaze from Mark to her and i swear time stopped. What was it about her? Jaye, i think youve completely lost it man.

She gave me directions to the facilities and i excused myself. Mark followed of course. Am i surprised? not really.

He didnt follow me into the bathroom but was waiting for me when i came out. "listen." He threatened as his hand found a spot on my shoulder and dug in. "Andrea isn't mine.. yet. but she will be; mind your distance." i removed his iron grasp on my shoulder and looked into the sactuary to where she was sitting. she smiled and waved. "I didnt even want her. (why am i lying to this guy?) until you said that." i started to walk away but stopped short and looked back. "I always get what i want Mark." I winked, then walked back over to Andrea.

Maybe it wasnt the smartest thing to say, espescially since i really did want her. But oh well, she would never be with someone like me anyways.

i sat next to her listening; okay not really. i couldnt tell you a single thing he told us. i just kept wondering how close Markk and Andrea really were. Would he tell her what i said?

"Jaye, are you alright?" Her voice broke through to my soul; sent shivers down my spine. I looked up at Andrea and Mark then stood. "It's about time." Mark snorted. Andrea gave him a dirty look and offered me her hand. "I'm sorry I was spacing out." I took her hand and stood up. "There's no need to explain Jaye." She smiled at me, then mark pushed in between us. "Sorry to break up this yuck fest but are we going to DQ or not Andy?"

"I asked you not to call me that." She grimaced. "And yes we'll meet you there." She didn't wait for a reply, she simply slipped her hand into mine and led me to the piano. She sat down and had me sit next to her. Music filled the sanctuary as her fingers moved rhythmically across the keys. When she was finished we sat in silence for a few seconds, letting the last note linger. "Wow, that was ... Amazing." She blushed a little. "Thanks, I wrote it for you." For me? I scooted closer to her and she looked away. "I guess you inspire me."

"What's it called?" I asked. She hesitated then replied. "I don't know." She smiled. "Yet."

We both stood and I motioned for her to go ahead of me. Man, she's amazing. And that song? Wow! I focused my gaze on her and followed her out. It was raining when we got outside, so Andrea and I huddled under my jacket as we ran to the car. Her laugh, it just blows me away. We sat in her car for about five minutes waiting for the heater to warm up. "Ahh, heat." I rubbed my hands together in front of the vent. "Quit being so dramatic." I gasped. "Me? Dramatic? Ha!" She laughed and put the car into drive.