September 20

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Jamie's Profile

All the way uptown

Almost architect


What skill do you wish you could master?

Gift-wrapping. Using tape, more broadly.


How will you make a billion dollars?

Selling TV rights to my ongoing tour of the City's best 24-hour diners, which I currently produce for an audience of zero (or one, depending on how you count).


What would you be doing right now if you weren't filling out your profile?

Right this second? Making eye contact with strangers on the subway. This app is all I have.


Do you want to have children someday?

Not sure, but I want someone who does.


Describe your ideal afternoon with your special friend.

Lots of tea and talking. Better yet: lots of tea and no talking. (Also, "special friend?" Grandma, are you behind this app? See, I really am trying to meet someone!)


What is your emotional age?

When it's sunny: 11.

When it's snowing: 8.

When it's raining: 76.


How would your best friends describe you?

Ages 0-8: Hungry.

Ages 9-16: Jokey but well-intentioned.

Ages 17–present: Back to hungry.


Best dating wisdom you've ever received?

Write your answers in lists and you'll get more clicks.


What are you looking for?

I'll tell you exactly—woops: that's my stop!


[New chapters will be posted on Instagram (@IfYouLoveWords)and Wattpad as they're written.]

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