Golden (Book 1 of the Golden Series)

Chapter 44

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"You ready?"

I look up from the picture clasped tightly in my hands and quickly wipe my cheeks dry. I didn't want to be caught crying anymore, it seems like it's all I do, not just now but my entire life.

Kristie sends me a sympathetic look as she walks over to me and crouches down, taking my hand in hers while her other pats the sleeping dog that's lying at my feet.

"I'd never felt like I didn't have a family before," I say softly, my finger tracing over the smiling faces in the photo, "But now I've lost the only one that I knew... and she wasn't even my real family, to begin with..." My chest heaves, "Why do I keep losing everyone, Kristie?"

My best friend pulls me into her chest and squeezes me tight. I know she's trying to stop the pain that I've been feeling for the last three days but so far nothing has seemed to work.

"I'm so sorry Elle, you've been dealt the worst in life," she mumbles, her voice breaking, "But I'm here for you, whatever you need," She pulls back and looks me in the eye, "And so is Cam, we're your family. Always and forever."

The feeling of sorrow that hasn't lifted since Mrs Grenway died seems to ease a little at Kristie's support and I can even feel my lip twitch a little at the kindness of them. I put the picture down onto my bed and sigh, the smiling faces of myself as a child, my grandmother and Mrs Grenway stare back at me - a life that now seems wasn't real. It was indescribable how much I already missed her.

"We need to get going or we're going to be late," I whisper causing Kristie to shake her head.

"We're here to support you, you take as much time as you need, everyone can wait."

She brushes her hands over my dress and smooths out the wrinkles that have formed from my hands being wound up in the material and dabs under my eyes with her fingers, no doubt trying to fix what little makeup I have on my face.

"You know she'd shout at both of us if I let you go to her funeral with mascara running down your cheeks." We both giggle at the idea and I'm almost shocked at the noise coming out of my mouth.

"She would, wouldn't she," I smile softly and think of her wagging our finger at the two of us and going on about personal presentation and how she'd expect us to make an effort for her big day.

"And she'd probably talk about how our dresses were lovely and we needed to live a little and show some leg and have fun."

Kristie and I both look down at our outfits and grin - it wasn't as if we could do typical funeral chic for someone like Mrs Grenway, she would have rolled her eyes at the sight of a mass of black being worn at an event. Instead, we were wearing clothes that had floral patterns - her favourite design and one that decorated pretty much all of her home. There wasn't a room that didn't have a wallpaper or furnishing without the bold and colourful petals of flowers from around the world all over them.

My dress is a blue pattern with pink roses over it, floating to my knees in beautiful silk material, Kristie's was yellow with sunflowers and fell to the floor - she said that as soon as she saw them she knew we had to wear them. I was glad for them - I hadn't left the house in days let alone gone shopping and I didn't want to let Mrs Grenway down.

"You good?" Kristie asks, beginning to pull me towards the door and I nod, taking a deep breath. I was never going to be ready to do this, so I might as well just take the leap and do it now.

"Let's go."

We leave my bedroom and begin to make our way through the hall, winding and weaving as we go. After the incident, it had all but been demanded that I move into the packhouse and I didn't even try to argue - it was hard enough sleeping in a house full of people let alone trying to find somewhere for myself. It almost provided a comfort having so many people around me - although I hadn't seen them really, I'd holed myself up in the furthest room of the house and only really let Kristie in to see me.