Chapter 37

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Camryn's POV

The drive home was silent. Colton held my hand the whole way and it was nice. We pull up into my driveway at about 9:15.

"I'll be inside in a minute," I tell Aimee. She smirks and nods, leaving Colton and I alone in the car.

As soon as she closes the car door, Colton brings my face to his and kisses me hard. I hold his face in my hands and try and bring him closer, but he still has his seatbelt on. He both pull away and start laughing.

"We fail at everything," I laugh.

"We just have to keep trying," he laughs. I lean my head against the headrest and stare at him. I notice something on his face. Something that I didn't notice back at the diner. It's a bump on his forehead. He notices that I'm staring and his face goes hard.

"Colton..."

"You should get back to your cousin, you've missed her," he cuts me off.

"Colton what happened?" I ask sternly.

"Camryn it's nothing I'm fine, go inside," he says harshly.

"I'm not going anywhere until you tell me what happened," I practically yell at him. I can't believe we're taking a step back. I can't believe he's not telling me something.

Colton gets out of the car and I follow. He hands me my keys and tries to walk away.

"Are you serious Colton? What are you doing?" I stop him. We were fine five seconds ago. Why is he acting so cold. I understand that facing the problems he has at home are hard, but I'd like to think that I'm the one he'd want to talk to about it by now.

Colton puts his hands firmly on both of my arms and looks me straight in the eye. "Camryn, go inside and have a good time with Aimee, I'm okay," he says. I can tell he's trying to be convincing. It isn't working.

"Colton..." I start.

"Please Cam! Just go inside!" I know what he's doing. He's trying to push me away. I thought we were past this, we are passed this. This is him trying to be a good person and not "inconvenience" me with his problems while I have a guest over. Instead of arguing with him and making him angry, I say one last thing.

"I may have company, but my window is always open for you Colton." I lean forward and kiss his cheek and walk inside.

I lean against the front door and slide down to the floor. Covering my face, I start to cry. It kills me to see him hurt and not be able to do anything about it, especially when he pushes me away like this.

"Camryn what's wrong?" Aimee says running over to me from the kitchen. I quickly stand up and wipe my tears away.

"We have so much to talk about," I say with a small laugh.

***

"Okay, let me get this straight. Colton despised you when you two first met?" Aimee asks. I nod. "Then you guys tried being friends?" I nod again. "But the sexual tension was just too much to handle?" I smack her arm. "Okay okay," she laughs. "And the first night you kissed was in your bedroom because he was running away from a reason you won't tell me?" I nod again. "So then you guys get together and you have yourself a hothead boyfriend who tends to fight people a lot."

"He's working on that," I interrupt her. She holds her finger up telling me to be quiet.

"And the reason you were crying is the reason he was avoiding the first night you guys kissed, the reason you won't tell me?"

"Yes," I nod. I let out a huge sigh and lay back onto my bed.

"What's the reason?" She asks.

"I'm not telling you."

"Why not?!" She pouts.

"It's not for me to tell, okay? It's very personal," I explain.

"Okay, I get it. So what are you going to do?" She asks, laying next to me.

"That's the thing! He won't let me do anything, he just pushes me away," I say shakily. I can feel the tears coming and I want to scream. I hate crying. I've cried a lot since I met Colton and I hate it, but I'm not crying over him, it's more like I'm crying for him. I am letting out the emotion Colton refuses to show himself. He tries to be strong but I know that it kills him inside. I just wish he'd talk to me about it instead of pushing me away.

Colton's POV

"I may have company, but my window is always open for you Colton," Camryn says before kissing my cheek and walking inside. I stand in her front lawn for a few moments before letting out a frustrated groan.

Why? Why do I do this to her. I push her away and I know that it kills her, but I don't want to ruin her time with her cousin tonight. My problems can wait.

I walk over to my house and quietly step inside. Luckily my dad is passed out on the couch with a bottle of whiskey in his hand.

When I got home from school in Camryn's car, my dad was pissed. He told me, in his stupid low intimidating voice, how I shouldn't be so defiant.

I decided to ignore him and try to walk upstairs, but he wasn't having it. When I reached the staircase he came up from behind me and smashed my head against the rail.

I blacked out for a little and when I came to, he was gone. My first instinct was to call Cam but when she said her cousin was visiting, I knew I couldn't just dump this all on her.

Instead, I iced my forehead for hours to get the swelling to go down as much as possible before I had to pick up Cam from work. I tried to act as normal as possible, but I can't hide the bump on my head. She knows me, she knows that something was wrong, I can't hide from her.

I drag myself upstairs to my room and lock my door behind me, last thing I need is for my drunk father to come in looking for a punching bag. I kick off my shoes and take off my pants before falling back onto my bed. I just want to sleep,but I can't, it's too early for me. Just as I reach for my phone to find something to do, it rings. It's Cam. I answer and wait for her to speak first.

"Hi," she whispers timidly.

"Hi," I say back. We stay silent for a few moments, listening to eachother breathe. "Camryn-" I begin.

"I don't want you to leave again," she whispers quickly. "I don't want you to push me away." Her voice is shakey and I think she's going to cry. This is what I do to her, I make her cry. Her cousin muct not be in the room or something because I know how much she hates to cry in front of others.

"Camryn, baby, I am not going to leave, and I am not going to push you away. I know that's how it feels, but you just have to understand. In my head, it seems like it's best for you, but I know you're here for me, I know that now Cam, I do." I try to explain my thoughts and I just hope she understands.

"Okay," she murmurs. We fall back into silence. Her breathing is still shaky and all I want to do is hold her in my arms. "Aimee just got out of the shower, I have to go, I love you," she says, her voice going back to a normal tone I know she's faking.

"I love you too," I say then hang up.

I hear footsteps coming up the stairs and I freeze. I release a breath I didn't know I was holding when I hear my fathers bedroom door close. My father is passed out in his room, Cam is with her family, and here I am all by myself.

In a way Cam is always there for me, but in many other ways, I'm alone.

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