To Keep Going On

Prologue

"Beam!"

"What the fuck do you want? Stop stalking me asshole!" Beam hissed at the taller guy. Forth had been following him around ever since that drunk night.

"I... are you alright now?"

Beam sighed. What do he do with this guy?
"Yes, I'm okay. I don't hurt anymore but you need to stop doing this or you will hurt. A lot!
You're not that great or big for fuck's sake!" He stormed the other person with his anger. His temper was all over the place these days.

"Beam I..."

"What? What the fuck is the problem here?" Beam shouted again. "Stop it... geez, you're not tired? Don't you have a life Forth? When do you study or enjoy? You spend all your time chasing me! Go get a life damn it, it ain't worth it. I'm not that important"

Almost a month but Forth was still adamant on taking responsibility. He wasn't a girl to be taken care of. Not like he'd get pregnant.

.
.

"I want to take responsibility"

"Huh... do you even hear yourself Forth?" Beam didn't get mad like usual. He felt so tired, he talked to Forth in a polite tone for the first time since that night. "I do not want to be a burden to someone who sees me as an effing responsibility!
I don't believe in love Forth but if I date someone, I'll do that because I love them. Not because they suddenly want to be a noble person. Thanks a lot! But I'm good"

He walked away with steady steps, leaving the tanned man behind frozen.

"Forth! Forth!"

"Huh?" Forth looked at Lam like he was seeing him for the first time.

"Ain't you tired of your game now? He doesn't want you"

Forth turned to look at the retreating figure of the smaller guy. He remembered that night so clearly, he even remembered the day after, all the times that he spent spying on the pale guy from afar, the way that doctor rebuked him at every chance, his actions, his words, his moans.

Forth huffed. "Not even close"

=====

"Forth! Wake up, idiot!" Beam kicked the man he found sleeping outside his dorm.

Forth woke up and saw a grumpy Beam in a loose shirt hovering over him. "You're lovely anyone told you that?"

Beam huffed and pouted. "I'm hungry. Let's go"

Forth hurriedly got off the floor. "Is that a date?"

"You wanna fall down the staircase accidentally?" Beam asked.

Forth just laughed. Was it just him or was the always elegant and friendly Beam becoming more and more grumpy and cute?

.
.

"You only call me when you're hungry" he accused the cute guy who stuffed his mouth happily. "It's 1 in the morning. What a selfless doctor!"

Beam looked at the time. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't..." he looked down at his lap guiltily. "Argh.. you should go now, I'm sorry I keep disturbing you"

Forth watched the tears in his eyes with surprise. He leaned closer to the smaller man and wiped his eyes. "Hey... I want to love you, Bee, not make you cry" he said softly. He was yet again surprised when the paler guy snuggled into his arms. Then he started crying his eyes out. "Beam!" Forth was alarmed.

"I'm sorry... you're nice, so so nice and I'm a jerk..." he sobbed.

"Oh no, you're not" Forth said. It only made Beam cry harder and hit him.