51. Back to the Mansion

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Revised.

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I thought a lot. I took two whole days to decide what I should do next; whether should I go after him and apologize or just leave the things the way they were right now.

Honestly, I was scared and too ashamed to face him after ruthlessly pushing him out of my life. I knew his whereabouts, his office, his home address, but still, could not muster audacity to apologize to him.

I was afraid of his anger, his rejection that he would not forgive me and tell me that he wanted to stick to his decision. However I tried calling him, but his phone was switched off and that thing demotivated me.

Zoya kept on pestering me with her questions like; where's daddy, when are you going to take me to him and why he's not taking my calls. I was just tired of making excuses to her and I guessed she was now smelling a rat.

"Are you sure with your decision?" Carol whispered a question in my ear.

I gave her a side glance, nodding my head, "Yes. I'll leave after the wedding."

She was about to say something, but when we heard the doors of the Church opened, she stood up and looked behind. I did the same. All the guests in the Church, who were impatiently waiting for the bride, turned around and faced the opened doors. And finally, Tessa, the bride of the day made her appearance.

With the enchanting smile upon her face, she began walking down the aisle, holding her father's arm and the bouquet of white tulips. Her long dress was trailing behind her. She waved her hand at us and I and Carol waved back.

I looked down and saw that Zoya was pulling my dress unconsciously while struggling to look up at the bride, but failing because of her small height. I chuckled and upraised her in my arms so that she can also enjoy the wedding.

I'm sorry. I'll keep saying this to you. I'll repeat those words every day and will show you how sorry I am to put you in anguish.

Ashar's words played in my head. It was not the first time. I had been hearing his voice since past two days. My mind was only occupied by his thoughts and recalling his words over and over again. His sweet memories and words compelled me to go after him and try my best. Even though, I was scared, but still I had to try or else I would regret for the rest of my life for letting him go over a mere misunderstanding.

I had resigned from my job, gave up on my rental apartment and packed my stuff. I was thinking to shift to New York. I delayed my plan only for Ryan's wedding. After that, I would leave this place.

You asked me to be a good father and I wanted to listen to you.

I squeezed my eyes shut and jerked my head in order to stop that voice.

"I hope you'll find your happiness." Carol pinched Zoya's cheek and smiled.

Tessa was now with Ryan and the ceremony was about to start. Officiant began reciting the verses from the Bible and all the guests settled down on their seats. There were around hundred guests gathered in the Church. Ryan somehow convinced his almost wife to shorten the guests' list. Tessa agreed and the list was shortened from two hundred to hundred guests.

I sat back on my seat and put Zoya beside me. Ryan looked handsome, but nervous at the same time. He was hesitantly stealing glimpses of Tessa who couldn't wiped off the smile from her face.

I just said I love you. Give me a chance to show you my heart. Let me show you that I regret what I did to you.

I fisted my palms as Ashar's words crossed my mind one more time. I was trying to stay calm, but I was losing after recollecting the memories of him. My heart ached every time I pictured his face. The restlessness inside me was increasing.

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