It has been 1 month now, since we went along with the plan. 1 month since I started going out with Zayn. 1 month of lying to Louis and the boys. It was difficult at first but then it got easier. Now it is getting harder again. Louis is acting suspicious around me as if he knows everything and every now and again, I catch Zayn studying me. Just like he knows me from somewhere. Both are pretty much true. We have been working on the album and it is nearly complete. They will soon be heading off back to England to film the video and continue with their famous careers. Zayn is trying to persuade me to come back with him but I am just not ready for that yet. My life is here now. My job, friends. I just wish I didn't have to lose Zayn. We both know it is coming and we have both pretty much worked out that a long distance relationship won't work but neither of us are ready to admit it yet.
We had the day of today, so the four musketeers were having a lazy day, watching films. So far we have watched, The Notebook, Grown ups and Remember me. So now we are all sat in our onesies with a 3 bowls of popcorn, 2 packets of Doritos, some sweets and about a dozen packs of chocolate biscuits, ready to watch The Hangover. This is the life. The room was a state but we really couldn't care right now. It was just us, the food and the TV.
5 hours later, we had finished the films and ordered a pizza. Well more like 5 of them but never mind.
'So Kate what's going on with you and Niall?' I blurted out as she stopped mid eating a slice of pizza and turned a bright shade of red.
'Nothingggg' She dragged out. She was sooooo telling the truth.
'Oh really. That becomes true, the day Josh becomes straight'
'Heeeeyyyyyyyy...Oh wait, your probably right' He shrugged and Kate attempted to hide away.
'So spill' I nudged here shoulder and she took in a big breath. We all sat in silent waiting for a reply.
'Okay fine I like Niall...but Megane likes Harry as well' She admitted, pointing to a not so innocent looking Megane, across from her.
'Don't drag me into this but yeah it's true. I just can't get involved with him though, seeing as they are going back home soon and we will be here.'
'Same, Niall and I have been talking and we know it is not going to work....Come on, when are you and Zayn going to admit, it has to end soon.' I dropped my head with tears welling in my eyes.
'I guess...that...neither of us want to actually admit it. I really love him and I don't want to loose him but I can't go back to Sky yet. Do either of you get the feeling of a bolt of electricity shooting up you, when you touch Harry or Niall or even Seth for that matter?' I questioned. They all nodded, realising what I was saying, was true. Zayn meant everything to me, I am lost without him, like I am without Louis. I guess this is the first time I have actually admitted it to myself. I miss Louis more than anything. He is a part of me and without him here, knowing it is me, I will never be the same.
'It's okay Jess we understand. I'm sorry.' Josh whispered, crawling over to me for a hug as the others joined in to. We stayed like that for a couple of minutes until we heard the familiar tune of Lawson's 'Taking over me'. We pulled away and Josh answered his phone grinning like a mad man.
'Okay. See ya soon. Love you. Bye.' He ended the call and looked up to us. 'Sorry Guys, Seth asked me to go out for a bit. So I guess i'll see you later.' He said standing up and grabbing his coat. Yes him and Seth are now dating. For a couple of weeks now I think. We were in Starbucks one day and he finally plucked up the courage to properly talk to him and I guess they just clicked and have been almost inseparable since.
'We best be hading off too. We have a lot of work to do.' Megane added.
'No worries guys. I'm getting tired anyways.' I pulled them in for one last hug and then said goodbye as they all headed off home.
I really was tired and my contacts were irritating me. I headed upstairs and slipped into my pyjamas and removed the Brown contacts, revealing my Crystal blue eyes that still sparkled. They were so distinct and matched Louis' to the exact. I made myself a hot chocolate with marshmallows, whipped cream and a flake. My favourite. I headed back upsatirs and sat on my bed. I pulled out my laptop, logging onto twitter, reading through some tweets. Zayn's and Louis' caught my eye.
@ZaynMalik: Don't want to say goodbye, even though i know it is coming :'( x
@Louis_Tomlinson: Seeing someone who reminds you so much of someone else, that it breaks my heart.
Both brought a tear to my eye. They may seem really weird to fans, who were all replying sounding concerned, but I knew they were about me and I just wish they weren't.
@Jessica_Taylor: Don't want to say goodbye either, I am lost without you.
I pressed the send button as I heard a knock from downstairs. Probably one of the guys saying they forgot something. I wiped the tears from my eyes and trudged downstairs heading toward the door. I opened it, only to be shocked when I saw Zayn standing there looking like he would break down any second.
'Zayn'. I barely spoke.
His head slowly looked up and he opened his mouth, about to say something until his eyes widened as he stared at me in complete shock. I was confused. Was there someone behind me, something on my face. I wish that was what he saw because it only just clicked into to my head what he actually did see. I wasn't Jess anymore.
Tada ouhhhhh cliff hanger.
So Zayn knows now what will happen will he tell Louis, will they stay together, Will he keep her secret so many things could happen.
I'm Hyper now by the way, i think it is the hot chocolate i just had.
My acceptance letter just came from Hogwarts I thought you should know, yes i am special and yes i am going to Hogwarts, I met hagrid like an hour ago and i feel like a midget compared to him. someone save me.
What would you do if you were wrestling a cat for a chicken wing, i actually had to do that the other day. Quite fun actually.
so anyway please vote and comment
Charlotte ( Butt monkey)
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