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Chapter Twenty Five: Warning and Threats.
As I wake, the guilt creeps back in and my stomach sinks. The guilt never really left, it tainted my dreams, replaying the awful scenes from last night. I smile as I find Seth asleep next to me, his hand tight on my hip as he sleeps. His snoring is light and quiet, his gentle breath blowing on my face. I smile once more, kissing the tip of his nose before I move his hand from my hip, climbing off the bed and going for a shower. Changing into a top and jeans, I decide against drying my hair, not wanting to wake Seth.
As I walk back into the room, I wonder whether to go downstairs and leave Seth to sleep or stay and wait. I bring myself to leave him, so walk over to the window. Luckily, the window sill is wide enough for me to sit on it comfortably. I stare out the window, watching the garden with a small, sad smile. Nobody is out, just some birds on the grass. They turn their heads round quickly as they peck at the ground, looking nervous. They know . . .
Seth groans and stirs, but after a slightly loudly snore, he goes back to sleep. I smile, watching him for a while before turning back to the window. The guilt increases and I find it hard not to cry. I killed last night. I killed two people. For what? My own, selfish gain.
I fight the guilt, not wanting to feel it, but then I feel guilty about that. Why should I have the right not to feel guilty when I killed? I sigh, leaning against the glass of the window, watching Seth for a while, trying to forget the events of last night, but unable to, the pictures burning in my mind.
Those people, they could have had families and friends. They could have been parents, had children, hell, they could have even had grandchildren. I feel even more guilty. If I'm sitting here, close to tears now, what are those families going to be like when they hear mummy or daddy isn't coming home?
I think about the families, how they are going to get the worst news possible. Will they be angry? Sad? Will they want to avenge the murder?
I can't imagine how they'll feel when the police turn round and say they can find no evidence, that there is no DNA on the body, nothing to be able to confirm who the murderer is. Will they blame somebody? Will they find a likely suspect? Send them down?
I feel even worse, thinking about an innocent person rotting in a cell because of my actions . . .
Seth stirs again, but this time he wakes, rolling over to face me. he groans as the light hits his face and I close the curtains, smiling at him as he rubs his eyes and yawns. "Morning" I try to say in a happy, strong tone, but I fail miserably.
"Come here" Seth says, seeing my expression and I walk over to the bed. I lay next to him and he hugs me tight against him, kissing my forehead. "How are you feeling?"
"Crap" I cry, the tears pouring uncontrollably.
"I know, honey, I know how you feel" he says.
"I killed" I murmur, wiping my tears with my hand.
"I know. We both did" he sighs.
"You only killed one" I reply.
"Isn't that enough?" he asks.
"I killed two" I say and he kisses me again.
"It'll get easier, I promise" he says.
"I dunno if that's a good or bad thing" I reply.
YOU ARE READING
Lexie Moon seems perfect but everything in her life is fake. Her parents divorce is destroying her and her school life is controlled by Casey, her ''best friend'' and most popular girl at school. One law dominates the school life: Don't Talk To Set...