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•< Tori's outfit above >•
•{ Tori's POV }•

The past few weeks I haven't spoken to anyone.
I went to Diego's funeral and the other fallen men services and I payed my respects.

Even though I haven't spoken to anyone I'm still in the loop of everything. I don't go downstairs when everyone is here most of the time I stay in my room, the library, or the gym and training area.

I only train with Michael. Sometimes Greta sits with me in the library but outside of that the only other person I really see is Luca.

He stays in my room with me every night we have dinner, take a bath, then go to sleep. Sometimes he turns on tv but I always end up falling asleep.

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This morning I woke up after two and half weeks of not feeling like I was actually in my body and now I feel like myself again.

Last night was my first night without a nightmare since everything happened and I slept peacefully.

So this morning after Luca left..Greta brung up my breakfast and I ate it but then I ended up over the toilet. All week I've been feeling nauseous but I hadn't actually gotten sick till this morning. I haven't told anyone about it obviously and they probably think my lack of eating has to with the events and that had a little to do with it but not as much as the nauseousness did.

After the whole over the toilet episode I clean myself up and took a shower and brushed my teeth. Then I did my hair and makeup. The only other time I've done that since everything was for Diego's funeral.

I get dressed in an outfit that makes me feel more like myself and even more so now that the bruises are fading. I add a necklace and some earrings and then I spray on my favorite perfume Britney Spears Fantasy then I slip on some black heeled boots that are surprisingly comfortable.

I grab my phone and wallet. Then I sneak downstairs knowing that Vera, Greta, Angelina, and Elena are in the kitchen. I also know that all the guys are in the meeting room trying to find a way to end the whole Russian mafia forever.

So I sneak to the garage and grab the keys to the blacked out sports car and then I get in the car and head out towards the store...

Today is the day I pull myself back together and it's also the day I find out what is going on with my body.

And it's actually feels good to be myself and out again..

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I get to the store and I go inside it only took like twenty minutes to get here. I go down the feminine aisle and I grab four pregnancy tests and then I grab a huge bottle of water.

I pay for it then I chug the whole bottle of water on the way to the nearest gas station.

I go inside their bathroom and take all four tests because if they are negative I'll just throw them away if they are positive I'll put them in one of the boxes and take them with me.

I can't say how I feel because I never even knew if I wanted kids for sure or not but here I am...

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