38. Forgetting Something

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-Jordan-

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-Jordan-


The day went by in our household just like any other, but I couldn't concentrate on my chores. I had promised to see my mom again, and this time I wanted more than just one lousy minute with her. When I looked back to that moment when she had stood right in front of me, I felt a little ashamed of myself. I had the opportunity to have a real conversation with her face-to-face, but I ended up breaking down.

I tried not to be too hard on myself because that small moment had been really emotional for me and my family. It wasn't easy to talk when my heart cried in happiness. This time I knew to be prepared for it, and I wished the second time would be easier for my poor nerves. I had gotten used to Blake in no time, so I assumed it would be easier to get used to my own mother, who had been there for me right from the beginning of my unfortunate life.

I smiled when that thought passed my mind. I used to call my life a lot worse than "unfortunate". After Blake had stepped into my home for the first time, I had learned to see the bright side of things. I was still twenty-three, I still had a long life ahead of me. The past seventeen years had been awful, but it didn't mean that the rest of the time I still had left would be the same.

"Don't laugh at me," Blake chuckled, and I turned to look at him. "I've been homeless for my entire life, so I don't know how to use this... this... what is this?"

We were in my kitchen, making salmon and potatoes for dinner. Blake was trying to help, but he spent most of the time going through the cabinets and picking up items he didn't know. His latest find was a hand mixer and he kept turning it around in his hands with a confused look in his eyes.

"You haven't seen one before?" I asked and took the mixer from him.

"I have, but I think those had some whirly rod-things..." He muttered, looking embarrassed.

"These?" I asked while opening a drawer and picking up the beaters.

"Yeah, those," He said and watched while I put the beaters into their places. "I know it's for cooking, but... I would laugh at myself too..."

"I wasn't laughing at you," I said quietly and put the mixer on the table. "I was thinking about how much my life has changed because of you."

Blake glanced at me carefully, and I gave him a reassuring smile.

"Oh..." he murmured and blushed a little. "So, you don't think I'm a complete idiot because I can't use your... what is this?" he asked and tapped the mixer.

I explained shortly how to use it, and what it was for before I took a small break and placed my hand on his, enjoying the softness of his skin. I wished I would never forget how amazing it was to be able to touch another person. Then I gathered my thoughts and looked at Blake again.

"I would never laugh at you. Me, of all people," I said and let out a sad chuckle. "If there's anything you want to ask, just ask. I won't laugh at you. You won't learn if you don't ask, right?"

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