I didn't dream again that night, mostly because I kept on jerking awake from the stiffness of my neck. But the times where I did sleep, I cherished too much for long dreams. Newt seemed to sleep peacefully, laying still along the back seat with his head lying down on my thighs. At least he was comfortable and getting some sleep. No doubt that he needs it. Thomas and Brenda had dozed off as well, occasionally groaning from their positions, but still having a better sleep than I was.

I sighed, giving up on trying to sleep. It seemed like it was early in the morning, possibly 2am. I was hungry and thirsty. I hadn't a good drink since we were walking through the god forsaken desert. I gulped down my dry throat and dug my fingers gently through Newt's hair. His blonde locks were slightly greasy, but not bad at all. It always amazed me. His hair always looked perfect on him. The blonde colour was so.... soothing and cute.

"Can't sleep?".

I looked up and saw Thomas had turned his head around so that he was looking at me. Eye bags had formed under his eyes, meaning he hadn't been sleeping as well as I thought he was. I blinked and nodded, before looking back down at the sleeping Newt. Thomas sighed and turned around, facing the front.

"I know that Newt will protect... even if I don't follow you two. At least I'll know your safe", Thomas said while putting his arm behind his head and leaning on it.

"What? What do you mean if you don't follow us?", I said while raising an eyebrow at him.

"I did this to us Mickey. I helped WICKED put us through the trials..... I need to redeem myself and get us out of it. Even if it means leaving myself behind...", Thomas said while avoiding eye contact with me.

Why is he saying this?! How can he even think of this?! Leaving us! Leaving me! Newt needs him, the Gladers need him! I need him! 

"Thomas, don't you even think like that", I said while glaring at him. He turned around and looked at me, surprised.


"Yes you may have put us here. Yes you may have worked with WICKED, but that was before Thomas. There is no before anymore, we just have to focus on getting through this. We need you Thomas. Not only me.... but Newt.... and Minho. The Gladers, we need a leader. Minho may be branded, but I'd say your more suitable than anyone else..... I can't loose you Thomas.... ", I said while tearing up slightly.

The thought of loosing my own brother, hurt my heart tremendously. Thomas doesn't understand how alone I would be without him. How alone would Minho and Newt would feel.

"Mickey...... I want you to promise me that if I go.... and that's a big IF, I want you to follow Newt and Minho", Thomas said while turning his full body around and sitting on his legs.


"Just promise me....", Thomas cut me off. "Newt and Minho would know what I would want. Just promise me and I'll try my very best to lead you guys to Safe Haven".

"....... I promise", I said. Thomas smiled slightly and nodded.

"Then I promise as well. Now, try and sleep", Thomas said before turning back around in the seat.

I was about to close my eyes again and have a failed attempt of sleeping, until I saw something through the wind screen. It was on the wall, and looked like a glass square. I was confused on what it was, and decided to point it out.

"Thomas, what is that?", I asked while still looking at it.

"What is what?", he asked me while trying to follow my line of vision.

"That, on the wall over there", I pointed to it, and Thomas finally saw it.

"Dunno, let me go check. Stay here", he said while opening the car door quietly, and walking over to it. I watched him and he bent over to look at it.

I waited for him while looking back down at Newt. I thought about what Thomas said. To follow Newt no matter what. But what does he really mean? Is he hinting that he'd rather die than follow us, knowing that he helped put us here in this hell? Does he really believe he needs to redeem himself? He doesn't even remember doing any of it.

All I can say is that I really hope he follows us through all of this. I can't say this enough, we need him.

I was pulled out of my thoughts by Newt stirring on my lap, groaning slightly. I watched as he cracked his eyes open, and looked up at me. He looked shuck tired, pardon my bad use of Glader language.

"Mornin'....", he moaned while closing his eyes again, turning over so that he was lying on his back.

"Well.... early morning...", I said while smiling down at him. He stifled a light laugh, before opening his eyes fully.

"Where's Tommy?", he asked while glancing at the driver's seat.

"Went to go see what that thing on the wall is over there", I answered.

Just before Newt was about to ask, Thomas came back into the car and closed to door with a soft thud. I looked at him and he looked troubled and confused. Newt shut his mouth and turned his head so he was looking at Thomas.

"Well? What did it say?", I asked. Thomas stayed silent for a while, before answering.

"It said that.... I was the real leader".

Through the Anger (Sequel to Through the Sorrow)Read this story for FREE!