Chapter 5

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Aaron Sparks.Aaron Sparks.Aaron Sparks.

Everything turned to Aaron Sparks. I just felt like i could not resist to his charm anymore. I was observing him today and he was wearing a cheap yet flattering brown shirt with no sleeves and underneath he had a long sleeved white one on. Such a simple attire but what a wonderful match with that gorgeous man. His hair was messy as usual and his brown eyes were still emotionless. I  wish i could light up an emotion in those eyes. I knew I could. He was constantly avoiding my look. He was avoiding my own existance. Or maybe the correct word could be ignored.

I am not used to being ignored. The ignorance inspired by my looks was the ignorance i had never experienced before.

As soon as the bell rung, he disappeared in a second. I followed him. Silly girl, you should have known. I had that inner worry that it would be a girl he wanted to meet up with. i was a jealous woman and i am not denying it. It was him, aaron sparks. my whole world. The start and the ending of the universe. The stars and the comets ready to destroy and pull me right down to the centre of the earth during their falling. 

He was walking fast and i thought that i lost him for a second. He went to the backyard of the school and i hid myself behind a wall without him noticing me. He was waiting for somebody. I was sure that that somebody was a girl. A very lucky girl dreaming of making him fall in love with her. Stupid girl you should have known. You should have know that he is mine. You should have known that he doesn't fall in love. Aaron Sparks does not love anyone around him. He hates people. Josh could be an exception, of course. You should have known that he spends the night reading books before he goes to bed. You should have known that he wants to be a science man when he grows up, even though he is a really bad student. You should have known that there is more to Aaron Sparks than just making out with girls like you and playing football. You should have known that he is alone because he wants to be alone. You will never know those things but i do. Because i have spent hours of trying to figure him out. I have spent days observing every single and simple move he makes so i could understand that boy one day. Maybe i will. One day,

I can hear some steps approaching the place and i just get even more anxious. I would not be able to stand seeing him kissing another girl. As an answer to my curiosity, two junior boys appeared. That got me even more confused. Why did he have to be so mysterious?

"Do you have what we want?" the one boy, called Jared asked

"Yea, Aaron hook us up. Bring us the stuff"  the other one said. Too bad i dont even know his name.

"Chill out boys, I promised you to do my best. Its my own product and i got it just for you right here. I hope it will not disappoint you." Aaron said and he pulled sachets out of his bag.

I automatically understood everything. They were talking about drugs. My mouth stayed wide open and i just could not realise what had just happened. I was in love with Aaron Sparks with my whole soul and heart. I sometimes felt i could not take it. My feelings were crashed right at the moment. The smile on his face was now evil to me. His gorgeous slim and tall figure was huge and monsterous now. I wanted to get down on my knees and cry it all out. I waited for them to leave and i leaned on the ground and i hugged my whole body with my arms. Sobs were slipping right out of my mouth.I was a tiny all gathered up person lieing on the ground that just seemed unexplicably huge. I felt smaller than usual. I felt a tiny piece of paper blown away. Wind was my biggest enemy. No, Aaron Sparks was. I hated myself because i hated him. My soulmate. My friend. My lover? He was even more troubled than i thought.

I wiped out my tears and drove myself to the halls. I could not even look at him anymore. People were staring at me and they were continuously asking me if something was wrong. I guess they could tell from my red eyes and lost look. I was not repling back. I had only one destination on my mind. I did not care that the whole school was looking at me making my way to him, i did not even care that Josh kept asking me what was going on. He even pulled me against the lockers and said:

"Look at me, Jenna, and tell me what's going on"

i pushed him away without even looking at him. I approached Aaron, who was shocked, and i tried to slap him with my whole strength used. I even closed my eyes. I have always thought of closing my eyes when i would kiss him one day. And here was i with my hand moving to his face ready to take out all the anger and disappointment i was feeling inside. I opened my eyes and I did not see what i expected to. I saw him holding my hand right next to his cheek. He had immobilized me completely. Emotionally, above all. He placed his face really close to mine as if he was about to kiss me. Would he? His desperate look was my sweet death. He put his hand up on my cheek and he almost stroke it but i'm not sure.

"Let me go" i said and tears started falling again. Everyone was looking at us. The most confused among all was Josh, who looked like he wanted to smash something.Silence after the silence. The only thing I could hear was our breaths. It smelled like agony. It smelled like pain. He let go off my hand and left after saying "I knew it was you". He left me there standing all confused and broken watching and counting his steps to the exit. He knew it was me who followed him up there. He even knew about my feelings? I looked at Josh and he just put his face down, rejecting my look. He left, too following the opposite direction.  A crossroad. It is pretty well known though, that through labirinthums most people lose themselves.

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