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i'm horrible i know.

out of everything i've ever written this is the hardest thing to write.

i'm not going to continue writing on wattpad anymore.

i'm not sure whether i should delete all my books or just keep them up here for the sake of it but i'm not sure.

the reason why i have come to this decision is not because i am sad or going through another relapse.

in fact, it's because i'm happy.

i've been keeping myself busy. i have awesome friends (three whole ones) and i'm finally figuring out a way to love myself again.

2019 has been a massive fucking year for me, the most life changing year of my life.

i found out who my real friends were and who i'm truly going to stay friends with after high school.

i found a guy. my boyfriend. i love him so much and i know he loves me too.

i found myself looking in the mirror and not completely hating who i am.

i've understood that i have a long way to go in the road to recovery again but i am happy with where i am right now.

i'm happy. finally.

i know longer have to use writing as an escape or rely on my readers for happiness. i know longer keep my self cooped up in my room, writing to escape from the real world.

wattpad has always been an escape for me. for me to make up an imaginary world where everything only has one climax moment and then somehow everything got better.

but i no longer need that. i no longer have that want for that one climatic moment in my life.

i have accepted my good and bad days.

i love you all so much and you truly have changed my life.

i never thought that the girl who gets Cs in english would have over 100k views on a book she decided to start writing when she was having a bad day.

i never thought that i would make the amount of friends i have through wattpad.

when i first started i was in the worst please in my life, but now i'm in the best.

it's been a massive three years.

thankyou so much to everyone who has supported me through it.

i love you all.

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