Destroying a Monster (Xavier)

Breaking Point

                                          Xavier

We went to the bar again that night. This time we left a lot earlier than normal. I needed to get away from her and her mind games. Yes, that is what I believe all this is. I think she is wanting to fuck with my head. I know she is. There is no other way to explain how this girl has taken over my life in the past few days. I have to spend all my time forcing myself to keep my distance because as soon as she is close I suddenly can't think the same. When she is close, I think things I have never thought about another person. I feel things I have never felt. I hated it and what was worst was I knew I didn't have any power over it. As much as I wanted to be numb, the feelings still appeared. As much as I wanted, to push her away I would only allow myself to push her so far.

Since I started drinking heavier than usual, I was getting kinda tipsy when a random girl with brown hair came over to me. She had been with her friends earlier, whispering and glancing over.

"Hi." She smiled and blushed. I looked over her.

"Hi." I said not interested and turning my eyes back to the bar.

"So, I have heard a lot about you. You are Xavier, right?" She asked.

"The one and only." I said finishing my whiskey and pushing the glass towards the bartender for another. She giggled moving closer to me.

"I was wondering..."

"Look, I'm..." I stopped her before looking over her again. She was hot, I wouldn't deny it but I thought back to the girl that was now at my house. I shook my head aggravated, see no control. "I need a good distraction."

About twenty minutes later, I ran into Blade when I was coming out of the bathroom with the girl.

"Where have you been?" He asked then saw the girl. "Oh. Um...are you about ready?"

"It's still early."

"Well, well look at this." I turned to see Jeff. "Does your girl know you are screwing around?" I glared at him.

"What girl?" I shot back.

"Really? Still denying it?"

"There is nothing to deny. You wasted your time attacking a girl who's name I didn't even know." I said dismissively and started to walk away.

"Hm, that's strange. So I guess it's just someone who looks just like her staying at your house." I turned. How did he know? "Ah, that's what I thought." He laughed looking at his phone. "She looks so damn hot in that little tank top." He turned the phone to me and it was a picture from outside the kitchen window of her at the sink. "I can't wait to get another chance at her." Images of her from that night flashed in my head. The thought of her being touched by that son of a bitch had me seeing red. I grabbed his collar of his jacket.

"You won't fucking come near her!" I couldn't help but react. Every fucking time he threatened her or someone touched her I got defensive. I had no control of my actions and it pissed me off.

"Woah, Woah!" He said smirking. "Damn, this one has really gotten to you. She must be amazing." Before anyone one else reacted I drew back and slammed my fist into the side of his jaw. He jumped back up and charged me. I don't remember all the hits it was a blur but I just felt all my angry behind every punch and my frustration was finally being released. I had been so frustrated with that damn girl and letting it out felt amazing. Being this person was easy. Being angry and not holding anything back was who I was and I was tired of keeping it all in. I knew he was getting plenty of hits in too, but I was to focused on the anger to feel them. I felt people attempting to pull me away but I fought past them. I heard a gun shot go off and Jeff was suddenly out of reach. I looked for the source of the sound and saw the owner with a shot gun.

"All of you get the fuck out of my bar or I'm calling the cops."

"Come on, Xavier." Blade pulled me I ripped away from him heading towards the door. I jumped on my bike and sped off ignoring the calls from the guys. I stormed into the house slamming the door. I marched to the kitchen and threw the fridge door open to grab a beer.

"Are you okay?" I heard her voice. That fucking voice. That voice that I was positive I would now know anywhere. I slammed the door shut and turned to her. She looked over me and her eyes widened slightly. "What...What happened?"

"You," I said through clenched teeth. "You fucking happened! You came out of nowhere one day and fucked my whole life up." She flinched. Good. "Now I have to be your God damn body guard, right? Well I don't want to! I don't want you here! I told you to stay away, and you just couldn't you had to ruin my life! This is your fault not mine! I warned you, you just didn't fucking listen! So you know what, get out, I'm done playing this game with you. I'm done with your little mind games. You did this on purpose! You act so fucking innocent. You want me to care, you want me to change! Not happening, I don't care about anyone and I damn sure don't care about you!"

"Xavier, what happened? You aren't making any sense."

"No, the only reason I brought you here was so I didn't get the blame if you showed up dead. But now I don't give a fuck, just get out! And if I were you I wouldn't try to run into me again, because you may not like what happens." I turned from her.

"I'm sorry." She whispered. I felt a part of me wanting to turn around and look at her but I crushed it down chugging the beer. The front door opened and I heard multiple footsteps come in.

"Xavier," I turned to Clutch.

"What?" I yelled.

"What the fuck, dude?"

"I wouldn't start tonight if I were you." I warned.

"Aubrey," I heard Blade say. "What's wrong? Where are you going?" 

"I..."

"She is leaving." I said for her. She looked over at me her face was wet but I refused to fall for her shit again. She was not going to change who I was and I was not about to let some goodie two shoes change my life.

"No, she isn't safe. You heard what he said..." Clutch started.

"I don't remember asking you." I yelled. I looked back at her. "What are you waiting for? Leave." More tears ran down her face and I looked away so I wouldn't give in again. She all but ran out the door.

"What the fuck? You can't..."

"Excuses me? I can't what?" He shook his head.

"You're a fucking idiot." He turned to leave and Blade looked at me shocked.

"What?!" I yelled.

"What are you doing, man?" He turned leaving too.