Time.

What am I doing?

*Niall’s POV*

BANG!

Oh shit what was that. I panicked, trying to smash the door down but it wasn’t going to move. I needed to get to her and fast, I didn’t know what I was going to walk into but I needed to get to her.

“Tayla? Are you okay?” No answer. Oh No this can’t be good. I could feel something in the pit of my stomach and it wasn’t a good feeling. That’s when I knew something was wrong and I needed to get in there and help her.

“Ouch” I could hear her, very faintly but she was alive. Why would be she saying ‘ouch’ unless she is in pain.  Maybe she hit something and that’s what the smash sound was. Her feet movements could be felt, but only slightly. Tayla is never like this and I knew something had to be wrong with her.

“Tayla please open this door and let me in too help you. Baby, please” I used all my power and love to get her to open that door but there was nothing in return. Not even a reply or simple movement to signal her reply. I could feel myself starting to become more worried and agitated about why she is doing this, blocking me out is something i never thought in my wildest dreams.  I could hear her phone ringing in her room, maybe she will answer it, and at least that way I will know she is okay. But nope, it just rang out.

Than my phone started to ring, I knew straight away who it was. Harry. The only reason I would know that is because he and Immi are meant to be coming over for tea. That won’t be happening now, I know that for a fact. I better answer his call and let him what’s going on.

“Hello Hazza. How are ya?” I say into the phone.

“Hey Niall, Tay didn’t answer her phone so I rang you instead. Umm you guys still up for tonight?”

Oh no. What am I going to say, I can’t lie but I don’t know if I should tell what’s going on, they have twins on the way, I can’t be making them worry.

“I think you better pay us a visit, like now” I say short and sweet.

“Okay? Is everything alright?” Harry says worried shitless I am sure.

“Just pay us a visit. Yeah?” I say and hang up the phone. Now I need to focus back on Tayla and getting in there to help her. Hmm what can I do, she has locked the door and isn’t answering me when I ask things.

“Baby, Immi and Harry are coming over. DO you want to come say hello?” I ask, hoping to God that she answers my question.

“No, I don’t want you or them near me. I HATE YOU AND THEM” She shouts back. I didn’t know what to say back, is she really meaning that or just saying that in pain. But the words did hurt that’s for sure.

A knock at the door was heard and I ran to answer it, thankful that it was Immi and Harry. Maybe they can help me with Tayla. They know her better than I do sometimes.

“Where is Tay? Is she okay?” Immi asks.

“Umm, there is something I think you need to be told”

*Tayla’s POV*

What am I doing to myself, I can’t let this get the better of me. I am stronger than this, I won’t let this push me down.  I look at myself in the mirror and see what I am doing. Blood running down my wrist and the pain increasing every time I cut my skin.  I can hear Niall on the other side of the door trying to talk to me and find a way in, but he is the reason why I am like this. Isn’t he? No he isn’t the reason I am doing this, Liam is.

“Tayla? Its Immi, please let me in.” What on earth is she doing here? Does that mean that Harry is here as well? I don’t want them to be here and see me like this. The pain in my arm was becoming more painful by the second. I look down and see the razor blade deep in my arms, blood falling from my skin. I wince at the site and the pain I am feeling, why did I let myself get to this point? A knock at the door was heard, it was much harder than the first.

“Tay, It’s Harry, please open this door. We are all worried about you.” Worried as If they care about me, nobody does and ever will I am a waste of time and space.

“GO!” I scream at the top of my lungs. The pain and negative thoughts were getting the best of me. I needed help an I knew that, but I couldn’t do that to myself. I wanted to just leave this place and never come back. Liam is the whole reason I am like this. I got up from the bed and went over to my water bottle, I took the lid off an got a tissue, an tipped a small amount of water on it.

I look at the blood that is fresh and dried up as well, I start to wipe the blood off my skin to reveal the deep cuts that I have put into my own skin. Once every cut is clean, a simple tear drops from my eye, I have now realised the pain, in a physical way but not a mental and emotional way, which I should of done in the first place, but no I have to fuck everything up, as per normal.

About 10 minutes later I hear the front door shut, signalling that Immi and Harry must have left. I need to talk to Niall and tell him how sorry I am, but I can’t do that right now. I need to sort myself out first before I go ahead with something else

*Hey all. So Sorry I haven’t been updating lately I have been crazy busy with school. Yr. 12 had their muck up day on Tuesday so that was good to see. But now EXAMS are around the corner so I won’t be able to update as much as I would like, but I will try to at least 1 a week.  Keep reading and comment/vote. I LOVE YOU ALL MY BEAUTIFUL JAZZ TAPPPERS. XOX*