With Olsen finally asleep, I could finally take the time to lay there and think about what I had just done.
I was still processing the fact that I told someone about my past drug problem, and how it felt like it was just yesterday when I overdosed. No matter how hard I tried to forget about it and no matter how hard I tried to pretend like that day never even happened, it always came back to haunt me. Sometimes, my demons were just too loud to ignore.
I laid here with Olsen by my side in the blackness of the night, but as much as I thought I wanted to be here, I actually felt the opposite. It felt like the only thing to do now that I told Olsen one of my deepest secrets was to push her away, because in my mind that seemed like the only logical thing to do. Now that she knew why Gemma was really here, I had to admit that I felt ashamed just being in bed next to her. I wasn't nearly as perfect as she expected me to be, and I never would be.
It was nothing personal against her, but it was just how my brain felt the need to handle a vulnerable situation- avoid it.
"Fuck." I whispered, and rubbed over my face using my hand before throwing the quilt off of my body. Suddenly, laying down felt like the last thing that I wanted to do, and I knew that I had to get up and do something else before I lost my mind.
I quietly left the room and started making my way towards the stairs, but then I noticed the guest bedroom door opening out of the corner of my eye. When I looked up and saw Gemma standing there in her sleepwear, leaning against the door frame and watching me with a look of disapproval on her face. We continued staring at each other for a few excruciatingly long seconds before she finally decided to speak up by asking me what I was doing, to which I replied with, "Nothing." It was my house, so why was it any of her business to know what I was doing up at one in the morning? It wasn't, but she was my sister, so therefore that made everything her business even if it didn't concern her, like right now.
This time she rolled her eyes at me, and I could see it even though the hallway was dark, "Yeah right." She said while pushing off of the door frame, "Why do you look like you've just seen a ghost?"
I just shook my head, "I don't know what you're talking about, just go back to sleep."
Unfortunately, Gemma knew better than to listen to me seeing as how she was the eldest and all, and also because she just knew that my demands were usually always empty threats. If she didn't listen to me and go back into the bedroom like I told her to do, then she knew there would be no consequence to it, and that's why I always felt the weakest whenever she was around. Olsen didn't know me like Gemma did, obviously, and Eloise knew better than to consistently disobey me since I was her father, so with them I never really felt like I lacked control in the house. I always tried to maintain a somewhat strict household, even before Olsen came along, but it was simply because I felt the safest when I knew that I was in control.
"No." Gemma replied.
I sighed, "Fine, whatever." Truthfully, I didn't really care if she listened to me or not anymore because I knew how Gemma was, and I knew that she was just as stubborn as I was, if not more.
I continued going down the steps after our little confrontation with the assumption that I was alone, but seconds later I heard footsteps following me as I went down the stairs and towards my study, where I intended on taking some personal time to sort out my emotions before deciding on what to do next. Now that I knew Gemma was following me, I silently kissed my alone time goodbye, and prepared myself for yet another confrontation with my nosy sister. I couldn't really blame her for being this way though, but I wasn't really in the mood to hear her tell me what I was doing wrong now.
YOU ARE READING
A desirable single father hires a plain looking nursemaid to help take care of his young daughter, but it quickly escalates into something much more complicated when feelings come to the surface.