ECSTASY.

004

iv. you want some ?
chapter four.

i move my face away from his, and he's evidently annoyed by the intrusion, looking at me apologetically before turning to the guy.

"not right now man," he says and the guy looks annoyed, fez opens his mouth again, "i'm busy," he says and nods his head in my direction. the kid walks off annoyed and i watch him leave before fez turns back to face me, our eyes meeting again.

"so that's your business? drugs?" i ask, slightly confused but more so disappointed.

"it's not like that," he starts and i shake my head.

"so were you gonna tell me or were you gonna sleep with me first and let me find out?" i ask, getting aggressive but i don't raise my voice but i back up a little hurt.

"woah mammas it definitely ain't like that," he says and i raise my brow at him.

"so whats it like then?" i ask and he sighs.

"listen, i don't just go around meeting pretty girls every day. and i especially don't go around tellin' people the shit i do. i didn't wanna scare you off," he explains and i turn to look at the pool instead of him.

i move my hand back into my lap and this time he doesn't reach for it back.

"i'm not scared it's just that i don't know if i wanna be involved with drugs yknow that's shit fucks lives up and i don't wanna be a part of that," i say, barely audible above the music blaring from the speakers.

the sound is giving me a headache and the alcohol is making me emotional so i just keep my gaze on the pool.

"you not gonna be a part of that shit lina, it ain't like that. you ain't like that," he says and i sweep a piece of hair out of my face and behind my ear.

"i don't wanna use you, i don't wanna drag you in my shit, i don't want you in that world. i don't have no bad intentions lina," he says and i turn towards him just slightly enough to meet his eye for a moment.

"i need a drink, i think- i think im gonna go get one," i say, getting up before he can even respond. i see him slouch back into the couch as i walk away towards the kitchen.

once i get there jules it on her way out, blood on her arm and it looks like she's close to tears. i move to follow her but i make eye contact with nate and it's almost like he's daring me to move.

he looks at me with emotion i can't read, like he just did something bad that he didn't want me privy to.

i furrow my brows at him and he turns and walks off into the house, leaving a passageway to the counter where the beer was.

it's only a matter of time before i move onto shots getting messily drunk, i can barely remember my name and im starting to forget words in english.
the whole world feels like it's on tilt and i just glide from place to place until i wind up dancing.
i don't know who's hands are wrapped around my waist but i'm too drunk to care. i put my hand behind me and grab onto the guys head, and the next thing i know he's kissing my neck.

we keep with the dancing, he moves his hands to my hips and i sway them to the beat, my body is on complete auto pilot, giving into complete hedonistic whims that a sober carolina would never give into.

he runs a hand over my chest and then down my arm, lacing our fingers together and then using my hand to run back over my own chest.

i give in and moan at the sensitive touch, tilting my head to the side and giving him further access to my neck and we continue our dance with our bodies flush against each other in the middle of a crowd of other sweaty, horny teens.