Song for this chapter^
(Self harm trigger warning!)
I lay on my back as I listen closely. I hear Navi leave her bedroom, walk quietly down the stairs to the kitchen its quiet for a moment, I then hear water being poured from the sink. Then a small "clink" of something being set in the sink.
Her footsteps continue out of the kitchen, I hear her softly walk up the stairs to her room, she shuts the door softly behind her. I hear her walk to her bathroom, run water.
Moments pass and I sign. Navi needs a good relaxing soak. I grit my teeth at the though of Jacy, what she put Navi through. I breath out steam, letting the fire calm down in my heart.
My eyes snap open suddenly, I dozed off. I turn my head and my eyebrows furrow, Navi has not come to bed yet. I close my eyes and listen hard.
My eyes fling open at the soft sound of water running. I fling the covers off me as I rush out of the room.
"Navi!" I yell as I trip over my self rushing to her room.
I lay on my bed for a moment. Looking at the ceiling. I then close my eyes. My inner demons yell at me, pull at my heart as they show the things I've done. The way I tortured people. Jacy saw darkness in me. I don't want darkness. I don't want to be dark or evil.
I can't drown my demons anymore, they seem to breathe water now.
I can't push them to the side, they dodge all of my attempts. They are here whispering in my ear, yelling in my face. Making me relive the past. The dark memories. Tears leave my eyes. I close my eyes tightly and put my hand over my mouth trying to keep the sob in. It escapes me as I try and keep my cries silent. My body shakes, my throat burns. I open my eyes, my vision is blurred
I can't do this anymore.
I sit up clumsily, I stand from my bed. I swiftly clean my room, put clothes up and make my bed. I rearrange stuff on my desk to make it more neat. I go to my bathroom and clean it as well.
I then sneak out of my room. I walk softly down the stairs into the kitchen straight to the medicine cabinet.
I open the cabinet in the kitchen as quietly as possible, grab the sleeping pills of my mothers, glass of water and take as much as I can swallow. I down the water and set the glass in the sink, then proceed to put the almost empty container of sleeping pills up.
I numbly walk up the stairs keeping my feet as light as possible. I make it to my room and quietly shut the door as soft as I can with shaky hands.
Tears stream down my face as I walk swiftly to the bathroom with a purpose. I seem to be on autopilot as I turn the knob to the bath on hot, full blast, tears stream down my face at a more rapid pace. I put the stopper in the tub and watch for a moment as the water rushes around looking for an exit before puddling up. I go to the cabinet grab the razors and quickly set them beside the tub. I start feeling heavy as the medicine kicks in.
I don't have much longer.
I couldn't do this anymore. I couldn't breath. I hated to do this to them. I couldn't live anymore. I couldn't live through the nightmares anymore. The demon on my lungs chanting in my head encouraging me to hurry.
YOU ARE READING
(Cover by Raven0820) Turning around Im met with bright red eyes surrounded by a grey mask. He has jet black hair that swirls up and back, his face is freshly shaved but that is all I can really see. He is tall and God is he built. He looks so strong...