• I'm Here •

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A/N: Let me just tell you guys that I had absolutely no intentions of staying away from Wattpad for almost 6 months- I've truly missed reading and writing regularly, as well as talking to all of you lovely people and receiving your feedback. I've met some incredible kind people through writing on here, and I hope to make good friendships with lots of you over time. If you ever want to talk, just send a message my way!

I feel I owe somewhat of an explanation as to why I've been so distant lately; I don't wish to go into lots of specifics, but my mental health has been on a steep downward slope since the beginning of the year, for many reasons, and unfortunately my writing came to a complete standstill because of the severity of my anxiety and the subsequent mental exhaustion I've been dealing with. I am in no way telling you all this as a means of getting sympathy, because I know that lots of people are in a much worse position than I. I do, however, feel it's important to share and, after months of feeling extremely lonely, it's a comfort to know that other people now know that I've been struggling, even if they are unable to understand the exact specifics of what has been going on in my mind.

So this is why I'm returning with an imagine tackling the issue of mental health and anxiety; I am at the start of my journey to feel myself again and get my anxiety under control, and so this topic is, to be honest, the one thing on my mind right now. This piece is mostly being written for my own benefit, to get feelings off of my chest, and the act of writing in itself greatly helps me to block out some of my thoughts. I do hope, though, that some of you may relate to this and that it's of some sort of comfort for somebody else out there in the world. It was extremely difficult to write and is by no means either my favourite or most well-written piece of mine, but I think it's definitely an important one.

I doubt that many people have been able to resist the urge to skip all of this bold typeface and get straight into the imagine (and I don't blame you in the slightest, this author's note has been ridiculously long!). But if you happen to have stayed with me until this point, then thank you, and I hope that you forgive me for staying away for so long. I have taken great pleasure, on the rare occurrence that I do sign onto Wattpad these days, in seeing the read counts going up steadily, even when I've been inactive, and it means so much that people still read my work. I have every intention of writing more regularly again, not only for my enjoyment, but because of it's aid in soothing my mind. So, thank you, to everyone who still reads these imagines and helped me hit 10K on this book. It means the world to me, truly, and I hope that you enjoy the work I have to come! Thank you, thank you, thank you. <3

*TRIGGER WARNING: If you are likely to be distressed by reading about difficulties with anxiety, then PLEASE put your mental health first and click off of this imagine.*

✰ Thriller Era, (1984) 

You tried to regain control over your vision as your eyes fixated upon the small slip of paper held between your vulnerable fingers. The letters and words almost didn't appear real to you, and just looking at the messy scrawl upon the crumbled paper gave you the sensation that your mind was travelling through a downwards tunnel at 100 mph. 

You weren't sure how you got to this point, and the sight of somebody else's handwriting before your eyes, instructing the necessary next steps, was something that your mind couldn't quite comprehend, although it had found a way to already consider the possibilities that the words could hold.

'Dr Camden, Prozac 20mg'

The handwriting was unmistakably belonging to your therapist, who you had only been seeing for the past month. You blinked your eyes rapidly, the conversation held between her and yourself earlier that day flashing through your mind again and again. You knew that her advice was valuable, but taking it just wasn't as simple as you wished it could be. There was one thing that stood in your way, the same thing that always stood in your way: fear.

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